Yamabyss

Fred and Mary got married, but can't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's parents home for their first night together. in the morning Johnny, Fred's little brother gets up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his mum if Fred and Mary are up yet. She replies "no". Johnny asks, "Do you know what I think? His mom replies, "I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school". Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mum, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" She replies "no." Johnny says, "Do you know what I think?" His mum replies, "Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school." After …

Hi guys / ladys First post so sorry if it poorly presented. I passed my test this week after a few weeks on off training. I had not riden a bike since i was 17 years old, must be the age because i had the sudden to get back on a bike. 3 weeks ago i sat the theory test (what was that hazard perception thing all about) Cbt & a few lessons later there i was with a pass certificate. Next decision what bike? Did some research on various sites on recomendations for a good bike to start with after 24 years no riding. recieved some great advice from severa; people & came up with a shortlist of 3. 1/ Honda cbr600f 2/ Yamaha Fazer 3/ YZF 600 Thundercat. Ca…

what's the difference between maggie thatcher and edwina curry? one fu*ked major the other fu*ked the miners

Martha lost her husband. She had him cremated took his ashes home, poured them out on the patio table. Tracing her fingers through them, she spoke to him, Bob, remember the dishwasher u promised me, I bought it with ur insurance money, the car u promised me, bought that, and the diamond ring, bought that too. Remember the blow job i promised u?..... Well here it fuckin comes!!

Morning Folks, Me being a nosie git. I want to know what everyones dream bike is?? Myself i would love Suzuki B-King. Also wouldn't mind an 08 R6 for the track. Cheers Guys,

http://www.nuerburgring.de/fileadmin/webcam/webcam.jpg check this out.... its the webcam for the neübergring race track in germany. its pretty interesting.

Two Irishmen are stuck in the desert, wandering aimlessly and close to death. They are close to just lying down and waiting for the inevitable, when all of a sudden....... 'Hey Paddy, do you smell what I smell. its bacon I'm sure of it.' 'Yes Mick it smells like bacon to me.' So, with renewed strength, they struggle up the next sand dune, and there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon. There's raw bacon, dripping with moisture, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon... every imaginable kind of cured pig meat. 'Paddy, paddy we're saved. 'it is a bacon tree.' 'Mick, are you sure its not a mirage? We are in the Desert don't forg…

EU Directive No. 456179/954PE/762 EU/UK In order to meet the conditions for joining the Single European currency,all citizens of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland must be made aware that the phrase 'Spending a penny' is not to be used after 1st. May 2008. From this date, the correct terminology will be: 'Euronating'. Thank you for your attention.

I phoned my bird to tell her I was coming on my bike. She told me to get in the house and use the bathroom.

Late last Saturday night, a young chap was walking home from the pub. It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was tired and freezing. Most Of the streetlights in the area were broken, and the silence was only Broken by the occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a Dustbin. Suddenly he heard a strange noise ... BUMP........ BUMP........ BUMP........ Startled, he turned around. To his amazement, through the driving rain He saw the faint outline of a large box turning into his road. BUMP........ BUMP........ …

Triplets A woman pregnant with triplets was walking down the street when a masked robber ran out of a bank and shot her three times in the stomach. Luckily the babies were OK. The surgeon decided to leave the bullets in because it was too risky to operate. She gave birth to two healthy daughters and a healthy son. All was fine for 16 years, and then one daughter walked into the room in tears. "What's wrong?" asked the mother. "I was taking a tinkle and this bullet came out," replied the daughter. The mother told her it was okay and explained what happened 16 years ago. About a week later the second daughter walked into the room in tears. "Mom, I …

Dunno if any of you go to these events (me, im a die hard rally-goer!), but this years 25th Anniversary Rock and Blues Custom Show has been cancelled. Further info HERE

It ' s not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be: 1. a friend 2. a companion 3. a lover 4. a brother 5. a father 6. a master 7. a chef 8. an electrician 9. a carpenter 10. a plumber 11. a mechanic 12. a decorator 13. a stylist 14. a sexologist 15. a gynaecologist 16. a psychologist 17. a pest exterminator 18. a psychiatrist 19. a healer 20. a good listener 21. an organizer 22. a good father 23. very clean 24. sympathetic 25. athletic 26. warm 27. attentive 28. gallant 29. intelligent 30. funny 31. creative 32. tender 33. strong 34. understanding 35. tolerant 36. prudent 37. ambitious 38. capable 39. coura…

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday." I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... They will remember. My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday! " It fe…

The Englishman's wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear. 'Good God, Daphne! Why aren't you wearing any knickers?' He demanded. 'Well you don't give me enough housekeeping money to afford any.' He immediately reaches into his pocket and says, 'For the sake of decency, Here's 50. Go and buy yourself some underwear.' Next, the Irishman's wife bends over to set her ball on the tee ... Her skirt also flies up to show that she is not wearing any knickers either. 'Jesus, Mary an…

Dear Wife, You will sure understand that I have certain needs that you with your 54 years can no longer supply. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore after reading this fax, you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18-year-old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don't be perturbed. I shall be back home before midnight. Honestly, Your Husband.X ..... Reply by the wife: My Dear Husband, I received your fax and thank you for your honesty. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. At the same time I would like to inform yo…

Guy takes his missus on a ride around Ireland, he's loving the roads but his missus is all fed up and wants to go to a pub and warm up. Fed up of her whinging, he pulls over and tells her to put her leather jackert on back to front, reasoning that the wind won't get through the zip and she would feel warmer. So he sets of again, the next pub is about 10 miles away he reckons, so decides to thrash it to get there quickly and so shut her whinging up. He's loving the twisties, getting his knee down and really enjoying himself...in fact it feels like she's not even there. Very soon he's at the pub carpark, pulls up and turns to his missus, challenging her to say that wa…

This morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed quietly, made coffee, grabbed my clubs, slipped quietly into the garage, loaded my clubs into the car and proceeded to back it out into a torrential downpour. There was snow mixed with the rain and the wind was blowing. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio for a few minutes and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed and slipped back into the still warm bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation and whispered huskily, 'The weather out there is terrible.' She sleepily replied, 'I know.…

Some ‘dirtbag’ in Polk County Florida who got pulled over in a routine traffic stop ended up 'executing' the deputy who stopped him. The deputy was shot eight times, including once behind his right ear at close range. Another deputy was wounded and a police dog killed. A statewide manhunt ensued. The low-life was found hiding in a wooded area with his gun. SWAT team officers fired and hit the guy 68 times. Now here's the kicker: Naturally, the media asked why they shot him 68 times. Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd, told the Orlando Sentinel : 'That's all the bullets we had !!' (Talk about an all-time classic answer !!!)

I just put a oil relocation kit on my 2006 v star custom. had a few leaks with the hoses on the kit at first but got that straight, now I have a new leak coming from my oil pan, somewhere on top. does anyone have the relocation kit on their bike and have you had any problems? could the kit cause undo pressure on the bike? Johnny.