Yamabyss

With age comes experience. With experience comes knowledge so to all you youngsters out there without this essential piece of information, read and learn what a woman says and what she actually means - i reckon this should be on the boys school curriculum from the age of 11 FINE:- This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never, ever use 'FINE' to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of these arguments! FIVE MINUTES:- This means at least half an hour and theres nothing you can do to hurry it up so dont even try. NOTHING:- This means 'Something', and you should be on your …

what does your car say about you Acura NSX- I am impotent. Alfa Romeo - I’m looking for Beta Juliet. Aston Martin DB7 - I have sweaty feet, but still women like to suck my toes, I wonder why? Audi 90- I enjoy putting out engine fires. Audi TT - I love golf, but I love my car (with no space) more. Audi A4 - Airhead who wants to be a banker, but is already a merchant . . . Audi A6 - I like/have to shave my hairy * * * *. BMW 3 series - I’m a successful sole trader & I can’t drive. BMW 5 series - I have a successful limited company & I can’t drive. BMW 7 series - I get other people to do my work, I’m far too important, but I still can’t drive. BMW Z3 - I…

just wanted to say hi. im new on here . my name is steve just getting back into biking got myself a dt125x and im loving it .

I don't know if its me but does anybody else think the new stuff they are laying these days seems worse in wet weather? When i'm at work in the truck if its been raining the thing will spin its wheels very easily, it doesent feel all that good on the bike either (Michelin pilot road 2 if your interested). I thought it was great at first in the 'summer' loads of grip, knee scraping if thats your thing. But now the temperatures are dropping off. I dunno, throw in some leaves and a few myopic car drivers still asleep at half four in the morning and you don't need coffee to get you awake. Comments.......

hi,just fitted a big one exhaust, there is no where to put the breather pipe that once connected to the original pipe. anyone help

In all the miles (300,000) I have ridden in the last 2.5 years, Ive seen lots of stupid driving, parking and general chaos. Heres just a peek at what Ive seen in regards to parking..... Firstly..A professional, ahem parks his instructors car on a junction and in a bus stop on a yellow line... Secondly...what happened here....Motorbike bays at an ASDA, but this managed to get between the bollards to prevent cars entering... Ive seen many things, cars parked in the outside lane of the M6, I didnt have time to take photos as I stopped to abuse them and move them on seeing as Id had to filter for 5 miles because they had decided to stop an…

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, 'How heavy is this glass of water?' Answers called out ranged from 8oz. To 20oz. _The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.' _ _'If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. _ _If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.'_ _'In each case it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.'_ _He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner …

A bloke goes to the doctor, and says, "Doctor, I feel like I’ve got something lodged in my arsehole." So the doctor takes a look and says, "Yes you’re right, I can see something." He gets his tweezers and pulls out a £50 note. "What’s that doing in there," he asks the bloke. "Ive got no idea doc, but is there any more?" Armed with the tweezers, the doctor has another look. And pulls out another £50. Then a £100. Then £50, then £20, another £100, and so on for about 10 minutes. Finally he says "I think that’s the lot now." The bloke says "How much was there anyway?" The doctor totals it up and says, "There was £1980." The bloke thinks for a minute and say…

Bear Remover A man wakes up one morning to find a bear on his roof. So he looks in the yellow pages, and sure enough, there's an ad for "Bear Removers." He calls the number, and the bear remover says he'll be over in 30 minutes. The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He's got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit-bull. "What are you going to do?" the homeowner asks. "I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof. Then I'm going to go up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off the roof, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and not let go. The injured bear will then be subdue…

Charlie was fixing a door and found that he needed a new hinge, so he sent his wife Mary, to the hardware store. At the hardware store, Mary saw a beautiful bathroom faucet on display while she was waiting for Walt, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer. When Walt was finished, Mary asked, 'How much for that faucet?' Walt replied, 'That's pewter and it costs $300.' 'My goodness that sure is a lot of money!' Mary exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to buy, and Walt went to the back room to find it. From the back room Walt yelled, 'Mary, you wanna screw for that hinge?' 'No, but I will for the faucet.'…

Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of Ireland. The attendant, who knows nothing about golf says “top o the morning to yer sir” Tiger nods and bends to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, 2 tees fall out of his shirt pocket “What are those?” asks the attendant. “They’re called tees, they’re for resting my balls on when I’m driving”…”Feck me” says the Irishman “BMW think of everything”!!

howdy...just been for a nice ride with my good lady on the back, her first ever ride. a wagons over took a parked car on a blind bend, coming at us, the espace in front slammed on. me too but cos of her weight the backs come up and iv hit into the back of the bugger. no one hurt, except a bit of a dead leg and so on but partner is good so thats main thing. bike isnt to bad i spose....see what insurance think of it. i reckn there just gonna blame me cos i ran in the back, thats always my reasoning. but what the hell is a wagon doing on my side of the road on a blind bend. bastard!! so got my eye on ebay, but if anyone knows of any or sees any 08 r6 bits, give us…

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_LCQkSst5iQ

Just passing on the info to get the link (and the little scrotes faces) round as many forums as possible. The name and shame idea is a good one, especially as the Police/courts/legal system don't seem to be very effective. Hopefully some local bikers will be able to give them a lesson or two. I mean riding lessons............. obviously.........little bastard........ HERE

how the fook do you de-restrict these bloody things

.....who scares the cr*p out of me most mornings. Flying past at feck knows what speed along the single carriageway sections of the A21 (whether there's clear road or not) is no way to ingratiate yourself with drivers. Or me, come to that. So far, you have almost clipped my bike's mirrors twice on your intercontinental-rated journey. Slow down, man or you are going to kill yourself. Or me and that would be far worse. Yours sincerely, Boring old fart Steve.

hello iv bought a dtr wheel off ebay with a big chunky nobbley and me being a half whit assumed it was road legal got it today and i like it but it says "not for highway use" as i live 5mins from the woods which i happen to spend alot of time in whats the punishment if i get caught and they see its not for road use on the back tyre? cheers

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/7645153.stm

You Sir, are an absolute fuckwit. Sitting in VERY slow traffic through Matclock Bath centre heading towards the top car park you were behind me. We were moving extremly slowly as it was very busy yesterday, then you - in your infinite wisdom decided you wanted to pass me on my INSIDE. You could not have gone anywhere because the traffic was so slow. You had already undertaken 2 of my friends that were behind me and whilst trying to undertake me you decided to have a chat on your fuckin mobile phone. I saw you when you pushed the front of your car level with my knee. I was sitting in the command position in the road ie the fucking middle so what mad…

bought my first fj1200 six months ago and what a bike it is too 16yrs old and still as good as anything on the road. am very impressed and suprised at the perfomance