Yamabyss

WOMEN’S ENGLISH Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = No I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry We need = I want It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later (see HERE ) We need to talk = I need to complain Sure, go ahead = I don’t want you to do that I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset You’re so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot Be romantic and turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house I want new curtains = I want new curtains, carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep Do you love me? = I want s…

Zeus the greek god was flying over ancient Greece when he spotted a georgeous woman naked washing herself. He made love to her then stroked her face and told her "In nine months you will have a child and you will call him Hercules!" She dressed herself smiled and replied "In nine days you will have a rash and you will call it Herpes now fuck off!!"

It happens to all of us ... So, I was riding into work this morning, and this dick in a truck pulls out in front of me ....

which one are you? 1. (_!_) Regular Arse 2. (__!__) Fat Arse 3. (!) Tight Arse 4. (_0_) Well Used Arse 5. (_?_) Dumb Arse 6. (_E=MC2_) Smart Arse And for the goverment (_x_) Kiss my Fucking Arse!

Just a word of warning to anybody running Pilot Power 2cts. In my experience sports compound tyres grip pretty much as good when they are almost worn out as they do when they are new. However this appears not to be the case with the one that I am running on the rear of my sports bike. It is about half worn out and does not have anywhere near the same level of grip that it had near new. Rather disappointing considering this was supposed to be Michie's state of the art world beater. Even more so when you consider the price. Having said that the front is as good as any thing else that I have tried. Anyone hammering their rocket on a set of half worn out Power 2cts,take care!…

hi everyone. im writing my own bucket list, its basically a list of things you should do before you kick the bucket (die). so what would be on your lists? im running out of ideas...

An Israeli doctor said, 'Medicine in my country is so advanced, we can take a kidney out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.' A German doctor said, 'That's nothing! In Germany , we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.' A Russian doctor said, 'In my country medicine is so advanced, we can take half a heart from one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.' The English doctor, not to be outdone, said 'Hah!. We can take an arsehole out of Scotland , put him in 10 Downing Street and have half the country looking for work within t…

Funniest thing i've seen in a LONG time

sound familliar?

Bloke goes into a pub, and the barmaid asks what he wants. 'I want to bury my face in your cleavage and lick the sweat from between your tits' he says. 'You dirty bastard!' shouts the barmaid, 'get out before I get my husband.' The bloke apologizes and promises not to repeat his gaffe. The Barmaid accepts this and asks him again what he wants. 'I want to pull your pants down, spread yoghurt between the cheeks of your arse and lick it all off.' She says, 'You dirty filthy pervert! You're banned. Get out!!' Again, the bloke apologizes and swears never ever to do it again. 'One more chance,' says the barmaid, 'Now - what do you want?' 'I want to tu…

hi everyone. kinda want to get me some cartilage piercings, was thinking maybe a couple of small silver rings in the back of my right ear (in the cartilage) has anyone ever done a D.I.Y Piercing or had a cartilage piercing before?, ive stabbed myself countless times with screwdrivers before and took a chunk out of my hand on a sprocket, so a little prick wouldn't be that hard to do i would think (no jokes please) failing that, an eyebrow stud... to complete the real authentic biker look

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. The Mobile phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. Man: "Hello?" Woman: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" Man: "Yes." Woman: "I'm at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only two thousand pounds. Is it okay if I buy it?" Man: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much." Woman: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2008 models. I saw one I really liked." Man: "How much?" Woman: "I think its 68,000 pounds." Man: "Okay, but for that price I want it with all the…

here featruring the late stanley baxter

Two elderly pensioners who have been married for 60 years are reminiscing about when they met each other when the old dear says “do you remember when we made love against that fence on my 18th birthday? Yes says the old man “do you fancy doing it again for old times sake? I think the fence is still there, lets give it a try. Meanwhile a policeman overhears the conversation and thinks “I have got to see this, and I will make sure the old couple come to no harm, so he follows them and watches the old lady drops her skirt and suddenly they are going at it hammer and tongs with incredible furious sex which goes on for ages until they both drop to the floor exhausted, the p…

i know those of you up'nath wont see this as a big deal, but down her 6 foot snow drift are rare as rockin horse dung. my mate who rides a divvy has a jeep today we went up onto the hills near bristol, his jeep amazed me going up icy 1:4 inclines check out these pics, iv never seen the area like this: btw im the guy covered in snow, after i dived into a snow drift!

A woman goes into her local music store looking for an old record; behind the counter is small young boy. She says: "Excuse me sonny, but do you have Jingle Bells on a 7 inch?" He says: "No, but I've got dangling balls on a 9 inch." "That's not a record is it?" "It is for a 10 year old."

Can anyone recommend a good yamaha dealer in London?

Hi everyone. just wondering, how far is it (avoiding motorways and dual carriageways) is it from John O'groats to lands end? and where can i get a decent set of road tyres? (3.00/18" and 2.75/21") - Steve

Winter Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED by Saturday, January 31th,2009 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. Class 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. …

A couple were invited to a swanky family masked fancy dress Halloween party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, woke without pain and as it was still early decided go to the party. As her husband didn't know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. So she join…