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The perils of posting images on forum threads.

This will have you in stitches

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=124653191

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ahahaha! a medic-alert bracelet some of us could use... :rofl:

browserbracelet_large.jpg

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LMFAO! I love Billy Connolly! Gimme two fire-breathin whores anyday... ahahaha! classic

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I recently put my pet python on ebay...
I get an enquiry...
"Is it big"
I replied
" yes it is....its massive"
Next question...
"How many feet??"

"NONE!! You daft c**t Its a F**KING snake!!"


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Me and three guys in the pub were struggling to settle an argument about who was the best lover when one guy suggested he had a sound measuring device and we should all take it in turns to record how loud our wives scream during sex.

We all agreed, so a week later we all met in the pub to discuss our results over a pint.

"Well I did the experiment," said the first guy, "and the device measured 89 decibels, beat that."

"No problem," said the second guy smugly. "I did the experiment and the device measured 98 decibels. Now, what do you say about that?"

"Not bad," I replied, "but when I did the experiment the device measured in at a whopping 128 decibels."

"128 decibels?" said the first guy. "How on earth did you get your missus to scream that loud while you were having sex?"

"Easy," I replied, "she walked in while I was fucking her sister."

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wife to husband "how many women have you slept with?"

husband answers, "only you darling... with all the others I was awake."

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A young boy had just gotten his driver's license and inquired of his father if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he'd make a deal with his son. "You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we'll talk about the car."

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer and they agreed on it. After about six weeks his father said, "Son, I've been real proud. You brought your grades up and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'm real disappointed you haven't gotten your hair cut."

The young man paused a moment then said, "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair and there's even a strong argument that Jesus had long hair."

To this his father replied, "Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they went?"

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