Yamabyss

A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other of the afterlife. Their biggest fear was that there was no afterlife. After a long life, the husband was the first to go, and true to his word, he made contact, "Mary . .. Mary . .." "Is that you, Fred?" "Yes, I've come back like we agreed." "What's it like?" "Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast, off to the golf course, I have sex. I bathe in the sun and then I have sex twice. I have lunch, another romp around the golf course, then sex pretty much all afternoon. After supper, golf course again. Then have sex until late at night. The n…

SIGN IN A STORE WINDOW 'WE WOULD RATHER DO BUSINESS WITH 1000 AL QAEDA TERRORISTS THAN WITH ONE SINGLE BRITISH SOLDIER!' This sign was prominently displayed in the window of a business in Glamorgan, South Wales . You are probably outraged at the thought of such an inflammatory statement. However, we are a society which holds Freedom of Speech as perhaps our greatest liberty. After all, it is ONLY A SIGN, you may say. 'What kind of business would dare to post such a sign?' Answer: A FUNERAL PARLOUR. (WHO SAID UNDERTAKERS HAD NO SENSE OF HUMOUR?) YOU GOTTA LOVE IT!!! God Bless The Welsh

Two Irishmen are stuck in the desert, wandering aimlessly and close to death. They are close to just lying down and waiting for the inevitable, when all of a sudden....... 'Hey Paddy, do you smell what I smell. its bacon I'm sure of it.' 'Yes Mick it smells like bacon to me.' So, with renewed strength, they struggle up the next sand dune, and there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon. There's raw bacon, dripping with moisture, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon... every imaginable kind of cured pig meat. 'Paddy, paddy we're saved. 'it is a bacon tree.' 'Mick, are you sure its not a mirage? We are in the Desert don't forg…

Best Pub "As good as this is," said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there's a wee place called McTavish's. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink." "Well, Angus," said the Englishman, "at my local in London, the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two." "Ahhh, dat's nothin'," said the Irishman, "Back home in my favorite pub, the moment you set foot in the place, they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like, actually. Then, when you've had enough drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see dat you gets laid, …

54:18 minutes black mx complete with mirrors and indicators

Late last Saturday night, a young chap was walking home from the pub. It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was tired and freezing. Most Of the streetlights in the area were broken, and the silence was only Broken by the occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a Dustbin. Suddenly he heard a strange noise ... BUMP........ BUMP........ BUMP........ Startled, he turned around. To his amazement, through the driving rain He saw the faint outline of a large box turning into his road. BUMP........ BUMP........ …

hi everyone. im writing my own bucket list, its basically a list of things you should do before you kick the bucket (die). so what would be on your lists? im running out of ideas...

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round trip ticket - he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting. He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie and promised to send the driver money from home but to no avail. The cabbie said "If you don't have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!" So the businessman was forced to hitch to the airport and was barely in time to catch his flight. One year later the same businessman returned to Vegas and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he w…

Hi all! I just wanted to know if these Yamaha Virago parts will be compatible with my Yamaha Dragstar 2001 model? - exhaust pipe. - rear wheel? - rear swing arms Thanks alot Regards

.....American & Iraqi motorcycle riders......is rather obvious

I rushed into an elevator last night, the doors were just about to close when this fat hairy hand shot right in and opened the doors. Out of the shadows the silhouette of a hunchback appeared, and with it emerged a foul woman who stumbled in and stood beside me, the smell of urine was overpowering making me gag, her bloodshot eyes and frothy mouth made me shudder and i thought to myself, How the fuck did I end up married to her?

News Flash : Today the world was stunned by the news of the death of the Energizer Bunny. He was six years old. Authorities believe that the death occurred approximately 8:42 PM last evening. Best known as the irritating pink bunny that kept going, and going and going, "Pinkie" as he was known to his friends and family was alone at the time of his death. An emergency autopsy was performed early this morning. Chief Medical Examiner, Dura Cell, concluded that the cause of death was acute cardiac arrest induced by sexual over-stimulation. Apparently, someone had put the bunny's batteries in backwards and he kept coming, and coming, and coming...

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman with gorgeous figure, big breasts etc, waving at him. She says "Hello"! He's rather taken a back because he can't place where he knows her from. So he says, "Do you know me?" To which she replies, "Oh yes, you're the father of one of my kids." Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife. So aghast he says:- "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the snooker table, with all my mates watching, while you whipped my bum with wet celery???" She looks into his eyes and says calmly:- "No, I'm your son's teacher."

Right guys and girls, I'm a bit of a weirdo (if you not already noticed) and i love any thing to do with the supernatural and trying to see if things are fake or if it has a slight possibility that the thing could be real or not. Now im gunna kick start something that could be the age old debate that is..................Do ghost exist? now im one of those people that only believes in things that i can or have seen with my own eyes, but with the ever better advances in science this question is getting easier to answer with scientific facts to back it up. I am a believer but still a skeptic believer in the way that i haven't "seen" a ghost but i have had a super…

The International Council of Man Laws. 1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella. 2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances: a. When a heroic dog dies to save its master. b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse. c. After wrecking your boss's car. d. When she is using her teeth. 3: Any man who brings a camera to a stag night may be legally killed and eaten by his friends. 4: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her. 5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a mate's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is uns…

New Bullet designed to kill watermelons ,Concrete blocks and Jelly....Does the commentator think he is Batman. So if the baddies shoot you with these every one of your organs will be damaged,Thanks America hope there is not another school massacre. http://rare.us/story/this-is-the-last-bullet-youll-ever-need-watch-and-see-the-technology-for-yourself/

Heya peeps . ive been a busy foamy recently... Ive bought another FTO! (my 4th one!), hopefully this one will be going back on the road for someone else to enjoy Only downside, 140000 miles on the clock , will need to turn this around at minimal cost for it to be saveable as i cant expect resale being anything more than £500 if that. on the plus side it has a stainless steel exhaust system, 17' alloys (in very good condition!), personalised number plated, a momo steering wheel and boss and is the non-foglight rear bumper version , could easily break it and make a decent profit. Will be beavering away down the workshop this weekend and ho…

An amateur magician accidentally turns his wife into a settee and his two kids into armchairs. He starts to panic. He tries every trick in book but none work so, in desperation, he decides to take them to hospital. Once at casualty, the magician spends a sleepless night while the medical staff run numerous tests on the unfortunate woman and children. Finally, the head doctor comes out into the corridor to speak to the magician. "How are my family?" he asks worriedly, "are they alright?" The doctor replies, "they're comfortable..."

Hi guys not been on in a while. Unfortunately I am forced to sell my pride and joys due to the wife saying she wants some space. Unfortunately irreconcilable now. Currently living in mum and dad's conservatory in Heald Green. Anyways my xt600 dt175mx and cb750 k8 are all planted on ebay at the moment as I don't have the room. Am OK. Gutted to list them but need to downsize. Many thanks for all your help. Regards Simon