barkwindjammer

Now look here stephen

:lol:

The next time your doing a job that requires a bit of patience, you know like oiling your chain or polishing chrome then think 'Tsuba'

Paddy and Mick sat having a point,, a lorry goes past with rolls of turf on,,, Paddy says "I'm gonna do that when I win the lottery",,, Mick says "What, drive a wagon?",,, Paddy says "No, ye daft kunt, send me grass to be cut"

Yep the bulbs are out up this way too

- Little Billy asks his dad for a telly in his room. Dad reluctantly agrees. Next day Billy comes downstairs and asks, 'Dad, what's love juice?' Dad looks horrified and tells Billy all about sex. Billy just sat there with his mouth open in amazement. Dad says, 'So what were you watching?' Billy says, ' Wimbledon .

Hi Folks, just in case! Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the shopping centre and in dark parking lots, etc. This is the first warning I have seen for men. I wanted to pass it on in case you haven't heard about it. A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular customers at B&Q, Halfords and the like as this caught me totally by surprise. Over the last couple of months I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends. Here's how the scam works: Two nice-looking, college-aged girls will come over to your car as you are packing your purchases into Your vehicle. They both start wiping your windscreen with a rag and Windolene, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. (It's impossible not to look). When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' but instead ask for a ride to McDonald's. You agree and they climb into the vehicle. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them starts crawling all over you, unzipping your trousers and distracting you with her mouth while the other one forces her body into your face whilst she steals your wallet. I had my wallet stolen Jan 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, & 29th. Also February 1st & 4th, Twice on the 8th, 12th, 21st, and very likely again this upcoming weekend. So tell your friends to be careful. What a horrible way to take advantage of us older men.. Warn your friends to be vigilant. Tesco has wallets on sale for £2.99 each. I found even cheaper ones for £1.59 at Homebase and bought all the stock in three of their stores. Also, you never get to eat at McDonald's. I've already lost 11 pounds just running back and forth from B&Q to Halfords etc. So please, send this on to all the older men that you know and warn them to be on the lookout for this scam. (The best times are just before lunch and around 4:30 in the afternoon.)

An original choice for a 'forum user name', its Biker_girls birthday ! , and a musical request sent in by 'anonymous' take it away Bachman Turner Overdrive http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BwwtpZnJmc&feature=related

Hi and welcome to the 'ward' Ozzie

Hi and welcome to the 'ward' Porky , fellow XJ6n owner

Its nice

An 'intro' in the 'Noobs' section ?

Can you wish Mrs Dirty a happy birthday from me then , can you wish your better half a happy birthday from me then

Yep Matty you cant repair the pump, you can test it by pulling the hose off the pump, put a tray under the bike and turn the ignition, you should have petrol pissing from the pump

Hi and welcome to the 'ward' Levi , nice bike you got there, safe riding m8

That should mean 'top-notch' kebabs too DDT, do Marksies sell kebabs ? congratulations big yin

Welcome to the 'nuthouse' thingwy

Welcome to the 'ward' Zsaba , good bike , furry boots ur ye fae ?

Nope, there's a speshil promotion on just now £1.99 with a free medium cheese water with ice check it out http://selleckwaterfallsandwich.tumblr.com/post/343399016/the-official-selleck-waterfall-sandwich-theme-song

Kev I can actually picture you pogo-ing to this in the 80's , how many disco's did you get flung out of for making the needle jump ?

Comparetheoldgits.com

Darren you old stoner !

Take the front wheel off Pat, take it to the nearest tyre place and get them to check it for balance-for a beer token (only 1 mind), before you embarass yourself check the profile of the tyre incase there's a bulge in it (unusual but it happens), like Jason says-move the forks back to their original position, and check if there's a lowering link on the rear shock too-remove it and put it back to stock. point 4 : eat your chinky at the side of the road, not on the road

Lesson 3 : stop off at 'Selleck' and get yourself a sandwich

Put it down to experience, kids cant be prosecuted, parents cant be held liable for any loss or cost, I cant believe that kids are still doing 'the old Indian rope trick' in 2011, we used to do this as kids and that was in the 70's , why arent kids this age out shagging and getting pissed ?, haven't we moved on ?, I blame the parents