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We have chooks!


Goff
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We have been to collect our chickens today

Yep - real live ones :D

Here's a couple of piccies of them - we have named them Elvira, Mina and Lilith :)

IMGP0435.jpg

IMGP0439.jpg

IMGP0436.jpg

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heres a photo of my chicken.

frozenchicken1.jpg

cant beat sage & onion stuffing and all the trimmings. :lol:

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Did ye get em from E-buy-gum, I said did ye get em from E-buy-gum lass? :)

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i only have a rubber chicken,sad.gif

Aye - "Up yours" Bet you choke the chicken often , laugh.gif & "Hi lisa howz it goin HEN "

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Aye - "Up yours" Bet you choke the chicken often , :lol: & "Hi lisa howz it goin HEN "

:lol: :lol:

Do not forget to lock the cage , your bull terrier seems to be very interested in them.

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You lot tell the worst jokes - i was was expecting them though :lol:

:lol: :lol:

Do not forget to lock the cage , your bull terrier seems to be very interested in them.

She is shit scared of them. She was quaking when she was near the hen house lol. I think they could hold their own though

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You lot tell the worst jokes - i was was expecting them though laugh.gif

She is shit scared of them. She was quaking when she was near the hen house lol. I think they could hold their own though

thats just a ploy to coax them in, then snap ?wink.gif
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You lot tell the worst jokes - i was was expecting them though :lol:

No "I'll fertilise your eggs" or things being "fowl" jokes yet....................

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Dave, apart from bits of tin-foil and string you found out in the desert-you also found other stuff your not telling us about, didnt you ! :blink:

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, apart from your bits! blink.gif

Go on Jammer show em ur last chicken in sainsbury"s picture ohmy.giflaugh.gif

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Dave came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.

He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke, he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed. 'Who the hell are you?', demanded Dave, 'and what are you doing in my bedroom ?'

The mysterious man answered, 'This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter.'

Dave was stunned. 'You mean I'm dead !!! That can't be, I have so much to live for - and I haven't said goodbye to my family. . . You've got to send me back straight away.'

St Peter replied, 'Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen.'

Dave was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.

A flash of light later, he was covered in feathers and clucking around, pecking the ground. 'This ain't so bad', he thought until he felt this strange feeling

welling up inside him.

The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, 'So you're the new hen, How are you enjoying your first day here ?'

'It's not so bad', replies Dave, 'but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode.'

'You're ovulating', explained the rooster. 'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before.'

'Never', replies Dave.

'Well just relax and let it happen'.

And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.

When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened to him . . . Ever!!!

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg, he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting...

'Dave, wake up, you drunken ba****d. You've sh*t the bed !!'

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