wild foamy Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Mike and Paddy were making letter bombs in Paddys garden shed one day. after a short while, Paddy stops and says "Hey mike, d'ya tink i put enuf explosives in dat last lettur?" Mike turns to him and says "i dont fekkin know, open it up and 'ave a look", to which Paddy replies "but wont it go off if i open it?" Mike has a think, and then says "well no, its not addressed to you, is it?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator drewpy Posted May 21, 2009 Moderator Share Posted May 21, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shed hermit Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 paddy and mick were walking down the road one day when a bomb went of in the pub next to them. a head came rolling down the street and paddy said to mick "jesus, is that not our pal fergus"? mick took a look at the head and said "naw, sure fergus is taller than that"! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator drewpy Posted May 21, 2009 Moderator Share Posted May 21, 2009 nnoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wild foamy Posted May 21, 2009 Author Share Posted May 21, 2009 Paddy and Mick were working on a building site, Paddy says to Mick "I cant be bothered working all day I just want to go home" so he climbs to the top of the building site and hangs upside down on a steel girder, on seeing this the boss shouts up "what the hell do you think your doing" Paddy says "pretending to be a light bulb" so the boss says "go home your being stupid" so he climbs down and starts walking out. Mick decides to follow and says "Im going home too" but just as he was putting his coat on to leave, the boss shouts "and where do you think your going" Mick says "home because Im not working in the dark" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imanupstart Posted May 22, 2009 Share Posted May 22, 2009 Bit of a power struggle going on when it comes to crap jokes around here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barwell1992 Posted May 22, 2009 Share Posted May 22, 2009 Bit of a power struggle going on when it comes to crap jokes around here haha lolllll Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator DirtyDT Posted May 22, 2009 Moderator Share Posted May 22, 2009 Stavic and Kobar are waiting for an interview as labours. The forman calles Stavic in and says "You have to pass a simple test" so holding his right hand up he asks Slavic "Which hand is this". Stavic reply's "Errrrr....I tink it is your right hand sir". "Great" says the forman "you can start Monday. Send Kobar in". Stavic leaves the room and goes to Kobar. He tells Kobar that the forman holds his right hand up and asks which hand it is so Kobar should reply "Right". Kobar gets up and goes into the formans office. As he walks in the forman is leaning out of the window shouting at someone on the site. The forman turns and says "oh is cold out there" as he says this he wrings his hands. Kobar looks at his hands and says..................................."Oh f**k he's shuffled them" How do you confuse an Easten block worker on a site? Place 3 shovels against the wall and tell him to take his PICK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barwell1992 Posted May 22, 2009 Share Posted May 22, 2009 Stavic and Kobar are waiting for an interview as labours. The forman calles Stavic in and says "You have to pass a simple test" so holding his right hand up he asks Slavic "Which hand is this". Stavic reply's "Errrrr....I tink it is your right hand sir". "Great" says the forman "you can start Monday. Send Kobar in". Stavic leaves the room and goes to Kobar. He tells Kobar that the forman holds his right hand up and asks which hand it is so Kobar should reply "Right". Kobar gets up and goes into the formans office. As he walks in the forman is leaning out of the window shouting at someone on the site. The forman turns and says "oh is cold out there" as he says this he wrings his hands. Kobar looks at his hands and says..................................."Oh f**k he's shuffled them" How do you confuse an Easten block worker on a site? Place 3 shovels against the wall and tell him to take his PICK how that is funny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xmastree Posted May 25, 2009 Share Posted May 25, 2009 Paddy and Mick are being interviesed for a job on a building site. Paddy goes in first, and the foreman asks "If I poke out one of your eyes, what would you be?" "Half blind" says Paddy "and if I poke out the other?" "Totally blind." "Very good, start on Monday. Now go out and send your mate in" So Paddy goes out and says: "It's easy, the first answer is 'half blind' and the next is 'totally blind' " Mick goes in, Foreman says: "If I cut off one of your ears, what would you be?" "Half blind" says Mick "and if I cut off the other?" "Totally blind." "How do you work that out?" "Well sir, my cap would fall over my eyes!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator mervin Posted May 25, 2009 Moderator Share Posted May 25, 2009 first Aerlingus flight into heathrow, pilot michael says to co pilot "Seamus dat runway looks a bit short too me", seamus says, "but just look how wide it is Michael" how can you tell an aer lingus pilot?? the gold stirpes on the top of his wellies, Oh i was talking to my mate from Belfast the other night, apparently it is now twinned with Beirut. (this is old) he said his wife had just started a new job as rear gunner on the milk float, what was the fastest game in the world in the 1970,s pass the parcel in an irish pub. right i am going to shutup before i start on about mountbattens plimsolls i will get my coat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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