Yamabyss

I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs... Phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them." I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi? I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I chec…

Can I please have a title like 'bad motherfucker' please ? I am sure I can leave the exact wording to your savage sense of humor ??? I'm feeling kinda left out and sad :cry:

I've just met a deer who could write with both his left and right hooves. He said he was bambidextrous.

watching storage wars and Barry Weiss turns up in this thing. amazing build by Blastolene, you drive it from the top cab

I had deja vu last night when i was watchin a Batman movie . It was when the joker was on , ive seen this face before aha Big Brother ( Jane Goody's mother ) god shes what nightmares are made of .

A man is stranded in the desert and has not eaten or drunk anything for nearly 36 hours. He is about to die. Amazingly, as he stumbles through the sand, he comes to three market stalls. The man (half-thinking he must be hallucinating) approaches the first stall and demands: "I need water, sell me some water." "Sorry, Sir," replies the stall owner, "I only sell custard." The man, visibly taken aback, goes up to the second stall and again asks for water. "I'm afraid I only sell sponge cake and cream," replies the second stall owner. The man turns in disbelief to the final stall and begs "Please, I need water now or I'll die." "Sorry Sir, I only sell hundreds and thousa…

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS: 40-ish................................49 Adventurous......................Slept with everyone. Athletic...............................No breasts. Average looking....................Mooooooo. Beautiful.............................Pathological liar. Emotionally Secure................On medication. Feminist................................Fat. Free spirit............................Junkie. Friendship first......................Former sl*t. New-Age............................Body hair in the wrong places. Old-fashioned.......................No BJs. Open-minded.......................Desperate. Outgoing........…

Did I read that sign right? TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW In a Laundromat: AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT In a London department store: BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS In an office: WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN In an office: AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD Outside a secondhand shop: WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN? Notice in health food shop window: CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS Spo…

Did I read that right? Subject: THE YEAR'S BEST (actual) HEADLINES OF 2005: Crack Found on Governor's Daughter [imagine that!] Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says [No, really?] Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers [Now that's taking things a bit far!] Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? [Not if I wipe thoroughly!] Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [What a guy!] Miners Refuse to Work after Death [No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!] Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant [see if that works any better than a fair trial!] War Dims Hope for Peace [i can see where it might have that effect!] If Strike …

As I mentioned when I first joined this club, I've never been one for the meetings and ride outs together. After reading Nev's Barmy EU plans thread, I thought for the first time in my life I'd better not do the British thing of just whinging about poor treatment and continue to do bugger all about it. For the first time in my life I wanted to contribute to something I felt passionate about, my bikes. I was aiming for the 1pm slot at the Holiday Inn on the M6 Junction 34 and from what I had gathered most people were going to gather there about 1230. I didn't want to get there too early and risk looking like a protest noob and arriving first so I though I'd land jus…

a bloke i know is selling one for 100 quid , i cant seem to find anyrhing about them on the web , only 1100 or 1200 , not 550 . any one got a pic if it ecsists

So before I got into motorcycling which has now pretty much taken over ALL of my free time, I used to build die-cast replicas of Police vehicles for officers and collectors. I've made probably 25-30 of them in total but it was turning into a job more than a hobby and that was one of the reasons I decided to stop making them for a while. After that, I was looking for other fun things to do with my time... Top Gun came on one day and Tom Cruise was booting around on his 900 Ninja....and it just made something click in my brain, that said, why the f haven't you done that yet? (ride) You're not getting younger.....so, I went and bought a bike! Anyway! Here are som…

This woman is 51 She is TV health guru Gillian McKeith, advocating a holistic approach to nutrition and health, promoting exercise, a vegetarian diet high in organic fruits and vegetables. She recommends detox diets, colonic irrigation and supplements. This woman is 51 She is Nigllea Lawson a TV cook, who eats meat, butter and desserts. I REST MY CASE

The Difference Between Men & Women NICKNAMES • If Laura, Suzanne, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Kate and Sarah. • If Mike, Charlie, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Sh*t-Head and Four-eyes. EATING OUT • When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Dave and John will each throw in £20, even though it's only for £32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. • When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. MONEY • A man will pay £2 for a £1 item he needs. • A woman will pay £1 for a £2 item…

This is the situation: There is a beautiful princess trapped in a castle guarded by a dragon. Here is the end of the story with different kind of metalheads as knights. * POWER METAL The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest. * THRASH METAL The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and ****s her. * HEAVY METAL The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and ****s the princess. FOLK METAL The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls …

was just wanderin a friend of mine said that if your full throttlein it if u keep tapping the clutch u will go faster i thought it was a bit weird but then i heard off some1 it can damage your bike ?? is it even worth it ?

Gonna have to get your act together Newman to beat this chap the Kebab Master... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tDLiiQWfDg

I dont know about anyone else but i find this deeply disturbing on so many levels. HERE What the fuck were the parents doing while their CHILD was having sex and i cannot believe that both sets of parents allowed this at all

All in all, it hadn't been a good day. Bad traffic, a malfunctioning computer, incompetent coworkers and a sore back all made me a seething cauldron of rage. But more importantly for this story, it had been over forty-eight hours since I'd last taken a dump. I'd tried to jumpstart the process, beginning my day with a bowl of bowel-cleansing fiber cereal, following it with six cups of coffee at work, and adding a bean-laden lunch at Taco Bell. As I was returning home from work, my insides let me know with subtle rumbles and the emission of the occasional tiny fart that Big Things would be happening soon. Alas, I had to stop at the mall to pick up an order for my wife. I co…

Do we motorcyclists just expect bad service? After my bad experience with Hein Gericke I put this to one side and decided to get some parts for the old TS. Sent Crooks Classic Parts an email with the parts I was looking to price up using their online form. The name, part number and quantity of each part I wanted was all on there. Left my phone number and email. They have a good search facility on their site and the parts (bar one) all seemed to be in stock. I did this Friday. Left it Saturday as I presumed that they would be busy with walk in customers. Called them Monday and they took my name and said they would get back to me. Thursday now and I have not heard a thi…