mervin

Anyone here on that big rideout yesterday (sunday 10th) from the Ace down too Brighton, loked like a good ride, saw hundreds of bikes on the M25 as i returned from dover with the truck, riding along very sensibly taking up most of the motorway between the M3 and M23 merv

Phil You are right there, pavements are for pedestrians, Merv

Unfortunate the pitting Ken not a lot you can do apart from getting it rechromed i think. there was a chromepowder coating system i saw pictures of not so long a go, Alloy engine castings coated to look like chrome merv

Yuck......!!! Can Cold Water Clean Dishes? This is for all the germ conscious folks that worry about using cold water to clean. John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Georgia. After spending a great evening chatting the night away, John's grandfather prepared breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast. However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate, and questioned his grandfather asking, "Are these plates clean?" His grandfather replied, "They're as clean as cold water can get them. Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!" For lunch the old man made hamburgers. Again, John was concerned about the plates as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg and asked, "Are you sure these plates are clean?" Without looking up the old man said, "I told you before, Sonny, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you fret, I don't want to hear another word about it!" Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog started to growl, and wouldn't let him pass. John yelled and said, "Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car". Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching on TV, the old man shouted . "COLDWATER, GO LAY DOWN!!!!"

Well you could try ebay to see if anyone is selling the kit off from a secondhand bike, but i would think respray would be the way to go postage is going to be very expensive and new bits from yamaha well they are not cheap Merv

Yes Scott men were men then, not overpaid prima donnas they were not afraid to stick their fingers up at the opposition, then have a beer together afterwards, life was more laid back not so many rules trying to help us too protect ourselves from silly things like aspirin, you could buy 200 then now you cannot buy more than 16 in case you wanna do yourself in, oh thiose were the days Merv

I do not reccommend hammerite as a final coat it goes hard and chips off after a few weeks, if you use hammerite stone chip over it to protect the stuff but also i remember getting anyother paint to stick to hammetite is a pig of a job, honestly i used to think it was marvellous stuff but will not touch it any more now it is too hard and chips off too easily, plastikote or pj1 is far better merv

WD 40 is also good for getting sticky residue off and i have not had it affect paint yet, i always wipe it off prety quick though merv

ken rub down the underside treat with some kind of rustkiller then paint with red oxide oir something then use stone chip protect paint the type of thing the use on the underside (sills just under doors etc ) do you have autosol chrome cleaner and polish available whree you live ? seems to do a great job. If yuo go out riding in the rain spray wd 40 on the chrome and it will stop the rust for a few days merv

Andy i remeber one guy used to appear at the local on sunday lunchtimes straight from work, one day his car had broken down, so he turned up with a tractor boots still thick with slurry straw in his hair. The he was promptly sent outside to the outside tap to wash his boots Merv

Andy the just one is a good helmet i find only one problem is it seems to steam up the visor if you close it completely and i bought a oxford deflector type thing to try and cure this but you cannot fit it to them I have not tried the justissimo with the sunvisor, pity you are not closer you could try one i have 2 as i use one when doing grubby jobs around the place when my hair is likely to get grubby and one for best, as iused working on the farm, the work helmet used to stink of cow crap etc not good when going out eh merv

yup Andy chopper, Calne bike day forgot me camera nicked these pics from Dels post on the Rd forum willl see if i can find a pic of that cafe racer honda later, oh and according to Del the bloke with the beard is Stemil from the RD forum!!!!!!!!!

Have you seen the calne wiltshire bike day in cmm recently loads of bikes including a cafe racer goldwing with leading link front forks clip ons etc many thanks to Del (superderek) for the pics he does not know i nicked em Merv

I have had 2 new helmets from ebay after trying on the same size model in a shop, savings are good sometimes but make sure it is newand from a reputable dealer, i got caberg J1 plus helmets, i find the opening front is useful cos i wear glasses, and you can open the front and slip the helemt on and off with your glasses still on, but always try a helmet first, if you are not sure what yuo want go to a big bike shop with a good selection of helmets with an open mind and try em on, remeber if it feels uncormfotable trying it ion it could become a distraction while riding, but some helmets tend to be a bit tight and give a litle as you use em Merv

Know em well Phil that wicker man seems to have had half his head stolen by birds to make nests. The camel has done good service Eh nice to see it has a baby now as for the T rex well, dunno what he is doing there, What happened to the elephant that was a few milesnorth of the camel? Oh i am in North devon between bideford and bude Merv

Kendo Phil Where are yuo in the south west ? merv

first is terrible second just bad A young man walks onto the stage of Stars in their Eyes, on crutches, with a plaster cast from his feet to his hips. Matthew Kelly Introduces him as Simon. 'It's very brave of you to come out here,' says Matthew. 'Please tell the audience what happened?' 'Well' replies Simon 'about a year ago, I was driving with my uncle when we had a really bad accident. Unfortunately my uncle was killed outright but I survived. I was trapped in the car for six hours before I was eventually cut free.' 'The doctors had me in surgery for 12 hours but they couldn't save my legs.' 'That's terrible. But I see you have legs now. Are they artificial? 'asks Matthew. 'No Matthew, while I was in hospital the doctors informed me that my uncle had in fact died, but that his legs were fine and with all the advances in medical science, they could graft the bottom half of his body onto mine. As you can see the operation was successful. I have been having physiotherapy for six months and hope to be walking fully again by the end of the year. A huge round of applause erupts from the audience. Kelly responds with: 'That's an unbelievable story. So tonight, who are you going to be?' Scroll down... Keep going this is great.... It's worth it honest.... . 'Tonight, Matthew, I am going to be Simon and Halfuncle' ------------------------------------------------------------------- Joe wanted to buy a motorcycle. He doesn't have much luck, until one day he comes across a beautiful Harley with a 'For Sale' sign on it. The bike seems even more beautiful than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It is shiny and in absolutely mint condition. He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years. "Well, it's quite simple really" says the seller, "Whenever the bike is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain." And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline. That night his girlfriend Sandra invites him over to meet her parents for the first time. Naturally they take the bike there, but just before they enter the house Sandra stops him and says "I have to tell you something about my family before we go in. When we eat dinner, we don't talk. Not a single word. In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes." "No problem" he says, and in they go. Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes. They sit down to dinner, and sure enough no one says a single word. As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation. So he leans over and kisses Sandra. No one says a word. So he reaches over and fondles her breasts. Still, nobody says a word. So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table, and screws her right there, in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mum horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word. He looks at Sandra's mum. "She's got a great body", he thinks. So he grabs the mum, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which way right there on the dinner table. Now his girlfriend is furious, and her dad is boiling ... but still total silence ! All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain. Joe remembers his motorcycle, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket. Suddenly the father leaps up and backs away from the table, shouting "All right, enough already, I'll do the f***n dishes!"

I am not sure i definetly think the 16 year old moped thing is dangerous maybe in towns and traffic ok but out on the open roads where you have trucks and old women in cars doing 40 and regular drivers doing anything from 50 to 150 it is very dodgy, I know i tried one once. looked behind to see an old granny following me about 3 inches from the number plate. It was my daughters bike she had been asking me to do something about it, so i removed the gearing restrictor it did 45 mph after that , never got to removing the exhaust restrictioons though. I think maybe the 125 then 33 bhp thing helps a little, we used to be able to ride RD250,s etc on L plates quick bikes to get on as a first bike in those days, 0-60 in the same time as the porsche carrera of the day i seem to remember and a top sped of nearly100mph(Ta for reminding me Andy), there were many 17 year olds bit the dust in those days on busy roads some of those bikes tended to go into tank slappers at high speeds , and youndsters did not know how to deal with it i suppose, merv Having a RD250 again now i can vouch they do not feel brilliant at 75/80 mph now on modern rubber. Most likely more sense of fear/self preservation than need for speed now

Well it goes like this here first you need to take a compulsory basic training course before you set a wheel near the road,then at 16 you can ride a death trap called a moped 50cc .025bhp 30mph flat out down hill with the wind behind it, then at 17 you can ride a 125cc 12.5 bhp bike until you take your test after that you are restricted to 33bhp for 2 years after that you can ride what you want provided the insurance will cover you. if you did not do this when you were 17 at 21 you can do what is called direct access basically you take your test on a bike of 56 bhp or more and you can then ride whatever you wish, A big problem in england now is what is called born again bikers I:E took there test on smallish bikes years ago never rode again since then relise oh i got to have a toy they go out and buy a new R1 or something wobble around for a few days then out into the traffic give it a blasting and end up embbeded in oncoming traffic,walls,hedges, etc through lack of experience Merv

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, The California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-bakedschemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions. Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes. If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the occasion and take time to pass it on and share that smile with someone else that may be having a crumby day and kneads it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEzMQIYkgds merv

2 tickets to last years british grand prix to the best caption merv

Nice pics again Pete, looks like a good ride, merv

Ah well Kevin B***dy Wilson has a song about chat up lines merv

Scientists have discovered that lager contains trace quantities of female hormones - something to do with the part of the plant that the hops are picked from. So someone did an experiment to determine the effect of this on the male... They took ten male volunteers, and got them each to drink eight pints of lager in quick succession. At the end of the test, it was found that they were all talking complete bollocks, and couldn't drive.