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mervin
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The late Pope John Paul II was standing at 'the gates' discussing things with St Peter.

Behind St Peter was a huge wall with an enormous number of clocks on it, and the Pope was inquisitive about these clocks.

Said Peter, "These are lie clocks. Everyone alive and dead has a lie clock, and each time they tell a lie one second is added to the clock. So when they come up here we know whether the person is also telling us fibs to get in".

The Pope thought this was a great idea, so he asked to see his clock. Sure enough, the hands were stuck on midnight never having moved.

The Pope had never told a lie in his life. A couple of clocks to the left were a clock with the second hand at 5 seconds past midnight.

The Pope pointed at it and enquired, and was told "That was Lord Nelson's clock, he told 5 lies during his lifetime to hide his affair with Lady Hamilton".

The late Pope was greatly impressed by this, so he asked where Britain's Ex Prime Minister "Tony Blair's" clock was...

"Oh that's not on the wall. Jesus has moved that into his office... he's using it as a desk fan".

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