> * What's the capital of Iceland? - About £3.50

>

> * How do you define optimism? A banker who irons five shirts on a Sunday

>

> * Why have estate agents stopped looking out of the window in the morning?

> Because otherwise they'd have nothing to do in the afternoon

>

>

>

> *What's the difference between an investment banker and a large pizza? The

> pizza can still feed a family of four.

>

> *As a surprise, a chief exec's wife pops by his office. She finds him in

> an unorthodox position, with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without

> hesitation, he starts dictating: '. . . and in conclusion, gentlemen,

> credit crunch or no credit crunch, I cannot continue to operate this

> office with just one chair

>

> What's the difference between an investment banker and a pigeon?

> The pigeon is still capable of leaving a deposit on a new Ferrari.

>

> *A lobbyist on his way home from Parliament is stuck in traffic. Noticing

> a police officer, he winds down his window and asks: 'What's the hold-up?'

> The policeman replies: 'The Prime Minister is so depressed he's stopped

> his motorcade and is threatening to douse himself with petrol and set

> himself on fire. 'He says no one believes he can get us through the credit

> crunch. So we're taking up a collection for him.' The lobbyist asks: 'How

> much have you got so far?' The officer replies: 'About 40 gallons, but a

> lot of people are still siphoning.'

>

> *The credit crunch has helped me get back on my feet. The car's been

> repossessed.

>

> *Latest news: The Isle of Dogs bank has collapsed. They've called in the

> retrievers.

>

> *What do you say to a hedge fund manager who can't sell anything?

> A Quarter-pounder with fries, please.

>

> *Bradford & Bingley employees are concerned they were given no notice of

> the takeover by Santander Bank.

> A Government spokesman said: 'No one expected the Spanish acquisition.'

>

> You know it's a credit crunch when...

> * The cashpoint asks if you can spare any change.

> * There's a 'buy one, get one free' offer - on banks.

> * The Inland Revenue is offering a 25 per cent discount for cash-payers.

> * Gordon Brown has stopped chewing his nails and started sucking his thumb.

> * Your builder asks to be paid in Zimbabwean dollars rather than sterling.

> * Highgrove has been repossessed.

> * Victoria Beckham is pictured shopping in Primark.

> * Alistair Darling's eyebrows have turned white.

>

> Gordon Brown, Alistair Darling and Peter Mandelson are flying to a world

> economic summit. Peter looks at Alistair and chuckles: 'You know, I could

> throw a £50 note out of the window right now and make one person very

> happy.' Alistair shrugs his shoulders and says: 'Well, I could throw five

> £10 notes out of the window and make five people very happy.' Gordon

> says: 'Of course, but I could throw ten £5 notes out of the window and

> make ten people very happy.' The pilot rolls his eyes, looks at all of

> them, and says: 'I could throw all of you out of the window and make the

> whole country happy.'

all of those were good!

loving your sense of humour - really good