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bear remover


mervin
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Bear Remover

A man wakes up one morning to find a bear on his roof. So he

looks in the yellow pages, and sure enough, there's an ad for "Bear

Removers." He calls the number, and the bear remover says he'll be over

in 30 minutes.

The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He's got a

ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit-bull.

"What are you going to do?" the homeowner asks.

"I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof. Then I'm

going to go up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball

bat. When the bear falls off the roof, the pit bull is trained to grab

his testicles and not let go. The injured bear will then be subdued

enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van."

He hands the shotgun to the homeowner.

"What's the shotgun for?" asks the homeowner.

"If the bear knocks me off the roof . . . shoot the dog."

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