kendo phil

Why? Why me? I am trying to sell a bike at the moment, not the best time of year to sell a bike, but its a winter bike - originally bought for the wife. Now we are with sprog its surplus to requirements. So why do I only get calls from fuggin' idiots? I had a couple turn up last weekend, I rolled it out of the garage and they both had a look of mild disgust on their faces, I knew it wasnt going to go well. I suppose its partly my fault, the advert says W reg bike (old W reg) £300. But this pair thought £300 got them a new W reg bike, after some kicking of tires and poking and asking some fairly insulting questions, they told me they had just been to a bike shop and their bikes are all so shiny and new. I suggested respectfully that they should go and spend 4 grand on a nice shiny bike and leave me alone. They then told me they were very interested and would be in contact shortly. Not a word since. Then there is the bloke who keeps phoning and leaving me messages to ring him back on a number that does not accept incoming calls. A £300 bike should not cause this much hassle!!

She is already very advanced with her biking hand signals.

Oh no! Those can be just as dangerous - I seem to remember that if you lean back and pedal hard you can wheelie over backwards on one of those suckers. In fact that may have been my first ever bike crash. I dont think we should give him any more chance to wreck any more two wheeled transport.

Crashing an R6 after 10 miles hmmmm? But we dont know the full story, could it be a heroic attempt to swerve out of the path of an erant old lady / cat that had darted in to the road, or maybe a bus full of nuns reversed out from a side street without looking. A friend of mine was knocked off when a sweed (the vegtable, not a person) fell from a tractor she was following. It would be wrong to assume that he is a plonker with no throttle contol without hearing the full story. But judging by the damage described, it didnt just roll of the side stand. I recommend a course of riding a fissie 50 with stablisers for about 3 months before moving onto a nice safe CG125 - I can tell you how to restrict it so its not too fast if you want. If you need any more helpful advice or sugestions please let us know.

yup 56 hours, it was tough, but I got through it Her first action was to yak all over the consultant, and she also managed to pinch a hospital baby grow as well, not bad for a 2 day old.

Megan Amelia was born to us on Tuesday morning at 5.33am after a 56 hour labour! So I need to fit a baby seat to the bikes and maybe invest in a side car (air cooled RD 250 combo?) Anybody know where I can get tiny knee sliders and a really small lid from?

Fortunatly in the liberal society of ours they can get off scott free and you will probably be done for littering. I intend to become rich and buy an island, build a track round the perimeter. I will be in charge of imigration, bikers welcome, no volvos. Of course there will be the death penality for bike thiefs and if you egg somebodies car or house you will have you knee caps shot. Anybody want to come and play?

Realisticly I cannot consider another top project until I have finnished rebuilding my 2 gixxers, stripped and rebuilt my VFR 400, though I do regret selling my air cooled RD, with orginal (if somewhat rusty) pipes and speedblock paint job. Top silly bike Reg started BAA if its still out there? Though if I find a v-max with frontal damage at the right price, I may be forced to hide it in the garage and hope the missus does not notice!

I am still yet to do anything with the CBR1000 lump sat in the corner of the garage, I had plans to build a single seater hill climb car using it, but so far its just been gathering dust! Maybe I could 'drop' it into an RD frame HMMMM? No that would be too far!??!

I will probably look for one that’s had a front end smash that has killed the forks, but hopefully not the frame. Then look for a complete R1 front end (god bless ebay) and mate the two together in an unholy matrimony of speed and (hopefully) cornering ability! And a T2 smallish turbo thrown into the mix (nitrous?)

As I feel the weight of impending fatherhood (any day now) and I have sold some of my toys, reducing my bikes down to 5 at the moment (and 1 kit car), I feel the need for a futile and rash purchase, maybe a v-max. Maybe I could street fighter it, then add a turbo? R1 USDs on the front? Oh god, I'm drooling into the keyboard.

those wacky racing types will do anything to try and save a bit of wieght!

I recon if I get my hands on a GT550 or 750 then I could connect the baby seat to the pannier pick up points!

Have you seen the mess that a cows makes of things that hit them? It would be like driving into a wall made of meat. Check out youtube.com there are a few home videos of motorcycles hitting things, its a bit grizzly especailly the motorcycle hits deer video.

I am interested - tell me more! age, size, bhp etc?

If weight loss is the game then I suggest swapping the bike for a tread mill. If you still wear your full leathers and lid it will help you sweat more weight out. You will be the envy of the whole town. If you need any more helpful suggestions please just let us know.

Unfortunatly with the law as it is these days, the thieving little buggers get a slap on the wrist for nicking your pride and joy, but if you lay one finger on them - its off for a stay at her majesties pleasure and a game of find the soap with a big man called Barbera

Post a discription of your bike (color/model/age - any distinguising features ie dinged fairing etc) I Im sure people will keep an eye out for it, but most likely place to track it down is ebay. Unfortunaly those thieving bustards can strip a bike and get it on ebay in a day or two. Thats why if you can describe any scuffed or bent panels or rips in the seat etc, if bits appear on ebay somebody can post the link here and you can try and track it down. Sorry this isnt any comfort, but it might give you some hope that atleast the thiefing little sods could be tracked down! My advice for the short term is to get very drunk!

Excellent - who is going to this? This missus is 7 months pregnent so I guess I wont be bringing her on the bike, unless she rides side saddle! We need to find and occupy the beer tent!

I was sitting in the front room this quiet sunday evening, when I heard the sound of a sports bike being revved, this is usually a sound that is music to my ears, but something was not right. I live at the end of a long cul-de-sac not ideal for top speed runs. When this bike (i think it was an R1 - moving too quickly to be exact) came hammering into the end of the close being ridden by a helmetless lune. He ran out of road so took to the pavement riding past my front door at about 30mph. He left the close after nearly totaling my neighbour and her small baby. If you are reading this Mr R1, then congratualtions, you are a great ambasidor for motorcycling and its morons like you that are making it so much more difficult for the rest of us! Please just think on because my neighbours baby has more right to live than you do to ride a bike like a twat!

I'm just outside Bridgwater, off junction 23 of the M5. Where is everybody else? Oh by the way - the Cellophane Factory is now shut so Bridgwater is currently Stink free, well mostly. If you are unfamiliar with these parts, there is an 8m tall wicker man (yes, just like in the film) , two plastic camals and a T-rex at the side of the motorway as you pass Bridgwater, so its all nice and normal round here.

OK its blowing a gale outside, my hangover, brought on by low quality beer, is slowing me up and the new tyres I have just bought and fitted are great but I have managed to lose the wheel spindle nut and cannot reattach the front wheel. Im going for a beer. Does anybody know when the next Bike show in the South west is happening?

I broke my only vice, one of the jaws fell off after I accidentally welded it to a bike frame I was fixing.

I have the guys address so if I ever find myself in Par, Cornwall, I may go and ask him for either my seat or my money back.

I will mention this to my friends band, they have just made a demo CD of thier stuff, mainly covers, but they are looking to gig! If you want loud rock and tribute bands come to Taunton, we have Rockers Live (www.rockerslive.co.uk) a venue of limited capacity, but I can confirm that it does indeed rock! Me and the wife have been to see G'N'R, Led Zepplin, Ozzy, Aerosmith tribute bands there and it was good and loud. They also do local bands and bands that play there own stuff. Our first is due in Novemebr so I hope to make a final pilgimage of rock there for one last session before I am no longer aloud out of the house!