Ttaskmaster

Cunt is a Latin derivative and isn't really very British. Half of what they list is more English than particularly British and is generally foul language rather than specific insults. The best example of a TRULY British insult is that wherein one appears to be complimented, yet in truth has been thoroughly decimated in verbal fashion but only realise such a number of days after the actual incident occurs. Reginald D Hunter described it rather well, when relating how he explains the UK to his fellow Southern Americans during his stand-up comedy routine. I am most certain there is a YouTube video of it.

On a Ton-Up bike like that, you need mirrors so you can see the Hayabusa that's about to pass you at 215mph!

That's because it's a dealer and they'll want to sell you the newer, more expensive version. Look around online. We've told you where to look... Eh? What has water cress got to do with this? And yeah, those are the differences between the two - The Custom is about performance, while the Classic is the same model, but with 20kg of extra styling on top which IMO drags it down and holds it back. It's also more expensive, generally. Everyone *knows* the Custom is better than the Classic, just like everyone knows the RED version of any bike model will always go faster!!

Hate to do yer thinkin' for ya, but... Look at this page, be inspired and go make stuff happen: http://www.lossaengineering.com/2011/09/07/1977-honda-cb550/

Cars have a dry clutch, motorcycles have a wet clutch - ie, the clutch plates are immersed in oil. THIS is why we use bike oil for bikes and car oil for cars. You wouldn't use nail polish to polish your bike, so why use car oil for a motorcycle? Get some nice Silkolene 10-W-40 and give that bike some love!!

>so parts will be difficult to find as time goes on. Will they? Most Viggie owners I know are doing fine. >So im considering an xvs650. Also discontinued in 2004... but again, no biggie. >Thing is they never seem to come up in the UK, they seem very rare. Well... I have one, my Mrs has one and about fifty people here all have one, there's several for sale on Bike Trader, several more on UK eBay, some on MCN's thingy, a load of them in all the local pages and parts are pretty darn plentiful (albeit comparatively expensive). Like Microsoft Helpdesk, I seem unable to replicate the problem... >I am particularly after a Classic one as they look better than the custom imo. Yeah, well.... I prefer the Custom as it's 20kg lighter and the styling is less showy. A lot of what makes the Classic look bigger is just a facade, like the cowl things over the front forks - Underneath, both models are the same. The ONLY advantage in the Classic, IMHO, is that it can fit bigger saddlebags... but 10 minutes and you can fix that with the Custom, too! >Also, did they change anything from their release in 1997 to present? Minor bits and pieces, but if it really makes a difference then the parts shop will usually ask what year yours is. If they don't, find a better parts shop. I recommend Wemoto for starters! >or someone who has owned that and a 535 and can give a review of the differences? 1/. Google some comparison reviews, as there are literally THOUSANDS of them out there! 2/. In brief: The 650 is bigger, but heavier and actually puts out less HP than the 535 with a lower power-to-weight ratio, but the difference isn't really evident in general. Most of it comes down to how you ride. I personally believe the 650 has better handling, especially when you bump up the rear monoshock and shorten the wheelbase. The 535 is piddly-small, too upright for my preferred styling and is often viewed as a Old Man's Bike, even though it was originally conceived as one sized for women and smaller riders in general. The 650 has a much larger tank and a longer, lower, sleeker profile (more evident in the Custom version). The brakes seem generally better and the 650s shaft drive is a massive improvement. I could probably go on all day, but I need to do some work and you really should go post an Intro - We tend not to respond well to those that don't

In the higher gears, don't whazz the throttle open and expect much. Instead, gear up as appropriate and, at the top end, gradually increase the throttle over about a minute or two. It will take more time, but you will accelerate and end up cruising at a higher speed, without over-revving the engine too! Same trick works for most sensible 125s.

Have you overfilled the oil?

Quick, Newbies - grab all the sale stuff while you can!!! Kinda sad news, but at the same time a LOT of their stuff from all price ranges was prone to issues. Most commonly, their stitching on everything would fail, from tank bags to clothing and proportionately HG had one of the highest percentages of returned gear. Double shame as the local one in Reading has some really cool staff working there!

I'm so tempted to kick them off when they do that. If ever I thought I could get away with it... That said, I believe I also pointed out that you get this kind of dickhead behaviour in all kinds of rider and that's why bikers have such a bad rep still.

Personally, I'd be visiting all the WW2 areas, starting with France of course and the Normandy beaches, then probably following the route of the US 1st Infantry Division through Liege in Belgium, the Siegfried line, Aachen, crossing the Rhine, through the Ardennes, crossing the bridge at Remagen, on to Siegen and finishing up crossing the Weser river into Czechoslovakia. Maybe head down to visit Sicily and North Africa as well.

There's not really any etiquette, so much as common courtesy and basic rules of the road. Same as if you're on a tiny Fireblade and filtering at 10mph, when I come up behind you on my MASSIVE bike trying to do 40 - Get moving or get the fuck out of my way. But understand that I will *politely wait* for you to get the fuck out of my way and give you time to find a safe space to pull into, before pootling past and giving you a thank-you wave - THAT is etiquette! I'm always surprised how a faster, smaller bike is so often ridden by someone who can't manage the same 'close-order' riding that I can on my slower, heavier, MUCH bigger bike - it ain't about how fast your bike can go, it's about how well you ride it! Anyway - My thoughts, as requested: 1/. Are you riding centre of your lane, in the Dominant position, or are you usually a little over to one side, thus presenting them space to move into? If the latter, try moving more central and denying them that space. 2/. Do they come along side you when you're stopped, or when you're moving above 20-30mph? If they're just passing, let them go - It's only 2 seconds of your time and it helps keep everyone safe around you. 3/. Do they literally come up alongside, or are they still behind and over to one side? If the latter, that's just a habit from riding in groups a lot and is normally perfectly safe. 4/. CHiPS... They look so GAY. Must be those haircuts, heh heh!! With points 1 and 2 there, be aware that not every rider has actually done CBT and not every rider is even sensible. Some are complete pricks, particularly during Summer when all the fucking dickheads come out - These are the biking equivalent of your stereotypical BMW drivers and boy racers, who go everywhere as fast as their vehicle will allow and will manoeuvre into anywhere they think there is space. Stay as clear as you can - There's a reason I rarely see the same riders the following year! Now... Scooters are most commonly ridden by teenage cocks whose dickhead parents cannot afford to buy them a Fireblade. You know if it's a cock because they're usually wearing tracksuits and trainers, or shorts and t-shirts with optional flipflops and try to ride the same as the Summer Riders described above, but with less skill and a tendency to hit/clip/crash into other vehicles. Give an even wider berth, or (if you're feeling confident) take a road position that further denies them space to cut in. Once you're moving again, blaze past them and leave them to whatever fate has in store for them. Also for the record - Scooters are also ridden by Office Girlies (often in all-pink kit that matches their paint job), Office Boys, mild-mannered nice folks and people who still remember what the Mods were all about. Many of them are nice folks, some even kiddies who are sensible - We have a couple of groups round here with about 4-6 teenage riders, all of whom ride in perfect bike formation. They will grow up to be very decent bikers! The Office types tend to be those who realise the Rush Hour advantages of 2 wheels and an engine, but cannot afford/cope with a real bike. Typically terrified of anything with more cc than them, so calmly ride past, giving the usual wide berth!

Married??!! Oh, thank fuck... I thought you'd done something REALLY stupid, like buying a Suzuki!! Have a great time and welcome to the Club!!

Would I scissor Sarah Silverman? Yes. Yes, I would...

Buenas noches!!

You either have decent custom leathers, or cheap custom leathers... but never decent *and* cheap. Anyway, please explain how you define 'custom'. Do you mean a set for a Custom type of bike, do you mean with a picture painted on, do you mean tailor-altered to fit you with a better cut... or do you mean a completely unique, custom, bespoke, 100% original design from a completely unique, custom, bespoke, 100% original pattern made to your own concept? If you mean the very long last one, I know a woman who can do this, as she makes things for me. Her prices are VERY reasonable... but you still have to pay someone to sit and conceive the pattern, calculate and draw it out so it fits you, cut the leather, stitch it all up (bike leather should be at least double, if not triple-stitched) and finally pay for the leather and any other bits you want, like armour. Bear in mind, you'll likely want it lined and possibly insulated too, which is even more complex.

That's why Bikers Only is the stopping order of the day for me. They seem to have at least some sense still! "You're stuck, broke down on a road where I'm the only traffic you've seen for at least 2 hours. I have food, drink, tools, cigarettes, extra clothing, a mobile phone (usually with decent signal), money and a strong desire to assist you without forcing you to suck my cock in payment or anything nasty like that.... but, what? 'Fuck off biker knobber, you don't need no help'?? Oh...Okey dokey, never mind then. If you're still here when I pass back in a couple days, I'll wave. Bye..... miserable prick".

If yeh're a biker, I'll be stopping to help. If yeh're wearing stupid stuff and talk to me about it (strangely enough, I tend not pass judgement on folks when it really matters), I'll be very scathing... but I'll still help.

NOOOOOOO......... whitewalls are so 1950s gay...

They're removable...

I used to look after a fleet of mainly Korean and Chinese copies. Every single one was a piece of fucking shite.

Full leathers, boots, gloves and lid. Always. Always. Fucking well always. Bloody hot? Vented leathers. Friend of mine was an advanced riding instructor. He lost his left leg from a bike incident while travelling under 15mph. A woman I knew (and hated) crashed low-ish speed in jeans - Her leg was de-gloved. Ride however you like in whatever you like. If you fuck it up and you didn't take all reasonable precautions, you will get NO sympathy from me - Just scathing sarcasm and possibly further humiliation. The kit isn't that expensive, either, so it's just your choice over whether you sweat a bit for a short while, or spend the rest of your life a crippled flid who can't even piss without someone to help you. I can't really paint a harsher picture of the reality than that...

There's a saying in South Africa... "There is kak... there is complete kak... and then there is Kawasak"! Get the Yammie!!

I stop for other bikers. Cagers and the like can usually get stuffed, but they at least have a sheltered place to wait for the breakdown recovery that they should all have purchased...

Paint the frame, engine and underlying parts matte black. Paint the tank, mudguards, accents, plastic and external parts Olive Drab or Sand colour.