Ttaskmaster

Dunno what you're so excited about - No-one's going to stop them or do anything about it.

Well, first off many Army boots have metal eyelets. The laces cost about 50p a pair and work very well, so try them next time. Alternatively - Buy some army boots anyway. Almost all types will do. Personally, I recommend 2nd generation Boots Combat High or BCH, if you can find them. I have a line on these if you get stuck.

Verse-wise, that scans suspiciously well..... Did you spend a lot of time thinking that up, or are you naturally poetic?

So what, £6 postage is 85% of the total cost, or a further 85% on top of what you paid for the laces? Either way, those are pretty expensive laces, chap.... Any reason you wanted these specific ones? Plenty of perfectly good laces at any Army Surplus or outdoors/camping/snowboarding shops. All cost a lot fecking less than £6!!!

Let all Ghurkas in, show the directly to the bar and furnish them with pints. Meanwhile, deploy the rest of the army and boot out all the lazy fuckers who are scabbing off our taxes - 'NATIVES' AND IMMIGRANTS ALIKE. No-one rides for free.

Actually, this country does NOT allow freedom of speech. Did you know that criticising an official of the EU is treason? Oh yes - Go have a look at the law. It's right there in black and white, buried amidst a long blurb about something very boring. Just another one they snuck by you while you weren't looking.

And it stops there - They usually have two or three as lifting a bike is the easiest method. So what if they see you? Can you defend against three gun-toting scrotes? How nice for her. As my South African friend would say - "How does she stop a bullet?". I once asked a copper why he wore a stab-vest, not a bullet proof one. He said, "Because knives never miss". Whereabouts are you? I'd genuinely be interested in how Kickboxing tackles knives. I have one of those 10" training types with the ink that leaves a big red mark if it catches you. They need a deterrant. The law won't let us do much to protect ourselves, so that is what needs changing. Dead bodies littering the area surrounding a pristine bike works, as aforesaid South African friend has already proven. Basically, the law here is not in your favour and the Police cannot enforce what they should due to possible lawsuits. The law must be changed and sitting around whining about it won't make that happen.

My first question is how many fights have you won where there were no rules or points? Not 'true', but 'True', meaning the safest defence. It's a reference to George Silver's style of fighting, which he wrote about in 1598. At the time, the Italian style of fighting was the 'big thing'. It was full of so many complex steps and manoeuvres that it would take a lifetime to learn and to miss one would put a man in danger of death. By comparison "Silver's" style, which is pretty much what most of the English used anyway, was very simple - Hack his arm off so he can't hold a sword, hack his head off so he can't fight. Same thing here - Loads of complexity when a simple move is far safer. Do you teach someone the Ultimate Touch Of Extreme Death before you teach them the first few basic stances? Like the Samurai Sword being the 'ultimate weapon', this 'nose through the brain' thing is one of those Urban Myths that gets bandied about the internet by so many armchair warriors. To do it, you need to get in very close to your opponent and be extremely precise with your manoeuvre. Suggesting that random people, most of whom are untrained and will have been woken up by their bike alarm going off, try it against potentially armed thieves is tantamount to asking them to step in front of a bus. Better to play it Silver's way - Attack from a safe distance and make every move a killing one. Since said people are unlikely to know how to wield a bit of wood or pipe effectively, shooting is easier. This is not a 'Look How Hard I Am' thread - I'd win that anyway, because I've just been looking at Goff's photos This is about dealing with bike thieves and our opinions on the subject. Mine is a simple, effective deterrant.

WD works well on grit, but some of the really greasy crap that bikes pick up will not wash out. You need a very fine-particled, dry lube. Graphite Grease will do this as well as lubing the mechanism. That's why it's used by many locksmiths and locksporters as opposed to WD40. WD is a lot less messy, though!!

No Tammy Wynette???!!! Get a Midland 48+ Multi from Thunderpole - They're fantastic. I got one at home and a Midland 42 on the bike!!

Get'cher coat, you sad twat!!

NO..... This is a Jawa;

Is it a Right Hand Drive model?

No offense.... well, no more than my usual posts.... but there are some fecking clueless children on this thread!!! Forget that... That's fer Jessies!!! Ever heard of the Glasgow Smile? Google it and then ask Tommy Flanagan (one of my favourite actors) how he feels about it. An old cliche that's really not worth bothering with. No True fighter would bother with it.... Speaking as a True fighter, I'd like to quote my teacher - "Simplicity is Efficiency's best friend". To that end, forget all this vengeful nonsense chaps - Just take five seconds out to shoot the fucker dead...... and then get on with your lives. Go for a ride, get laid, read a book. Oh, and leave the body where it falls so future thieves know what will happen if they try anything. Simples!!

Actually, I've found a lot of girls really take to the 125cc Cruisers. Low seat height, low centre of mass, gentle riding style, 'pretty' shiny bits, 70mph+ capabilities. Plus there's lots of adjustment in the bar angle to suit whatever reach they need. The Marauder and Virago are especially suitable for small people. The Eliminator is a bif naff IMO, but is another option. The Intruder is more for the racey types. The Shadow is about as quietly content as a Cruiser can get and has Honda reliability. The Dragstar is your good all-round deal with a medium Retro style - Neither Classic nor Custom, but a bit of both!!

Well, my dad really is a trucker , so I can slag 'em off all I like He's the bastard that made me grow up listening to Convoy and playing with CB radios Anyway - Nothing wrong with Clarkson - Met him several times and he's always been a gentleman.

Glad is sorted. I said to check everything

Yes, there are several. Google is your friend.

Heya Bilbo... Firstly - LOVE your avatar, dude!!! Secondly - It's a tough decision... One only you can answer. You can be the best rider in the world and still come a cropper due to someone else's fuckwittery... For this reason, a friend of mine recently sold his VFR 800 after the third crash on it. He's been riding for the best part of 15 years. However, his other half just knows he'll be getting another one in a year or so. Even I have moments when I really wish I had a four-wheeler - Usually when it's cold and pissing down Biking is a way of life and with risks that must be accepted. You can still die or be horribly injured in a car. Certainly extra training to re-hone those skills is a good start. Maybe give it a short break and then see how you feel? Good luck with your decision, mate!!

Feck knows - I'm just doing my usual bit and chucking ideas about.

Check everything over. Make sure the clutch cable is good, all the bolts are tight etc etc. Make sure you don't have too much oil in the sump. Maybe even change out the final drive oil. Check everything and always replace the cheapest parts first.

No... just my ammo Actually, been listening to some Bill Hicks (whose bastardised quote appears above) as I build my own Pulse Rifle

There's a hypercharger made by......errr..... shit, what's the name........ K-something.... Kuryakin? Everyone seems to have those, especially on 1100 Drags. There's bound to be schematics or a 'How It Works' page somewhere. Maybe copy that and build your own? How come you're alive after the back wheel went at 70, then??!! Usually, when one spoke goes, the whole thing blasts apart!!

Just like my Dad, then

You mean, your bike actually has a thing that tells you how much fuel it has left???!!! WOW, that must be one Space Age bike there, dude!! I am joking - Mine really doesn't have a fuel gage, though.