You can't get better than Spike Milligan - unfortunatley I should have put 'Old Spkikes' sayings in first - maybe some one will I hope.

There's a bit of logic somewhere with Groucho as well as Spike and all - Noel Coward and the rest..........................

To quote Groucho............'If a black cat walks across your path........this indicates that the cat is going somewhere'

'I remember my first sexual contact..........I've still got the reciept'

"  WELL"  I"v never been so insulted in my life" --   [ groucho]-  its early yet

(Spike) l'm not afraid of dying, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

'There is nothing worn under the kilt. Its all in perfect working order.'

(Spike)

Groucho: "I would never join a club that would have me as a member!"

Spike (on his headstone) 'I told you I was ill'