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What Can I Expect From a Cruiser?


GazzyG
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Hey guys - check out my intro in the intros section. :)

Picking up my new bike, an XVS 1300 Midnight Star, in a week's time.

It's my first cruiser; previously I've only had standards (H100S, CX500) and sportsbikes (GPX750R and Thundercat).

So my question is - how different will it be, riding a cruiser, particularly a relatively big one? Are there any hints and tips that I should know and bear in mind in order to make life easier for myself?

Thanks guys!

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Tassels on the leathers, grey beard, Ray-Bans, matt black open face lid, stony stare when waved at by other riders (unless they're on cruisers as well) and a large shareholding in Solvol .... I think that covers it.

.... and learn how to fist-bump your bro's on the move ....

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So my question is - how different will it be, riding a cruiser, particularly a relatively big one?

OK, this is just a quick, Cruiser-generic write-up...

First off, every wanker out there will make fun of you and take the piss mercilessly. Deal with it... or go everywhere armed (with wit or weapon) and kick the fuck out of them (by wit or weapon!). Your call. Dealing usually works best.

They *might* lessen off when they hear it's a large-size Cruiser, but 1300 is only just into the upper bracket. These days even an 1100 is now top of the mid-sizes.

Understand and accept that you're now one of the faggoty, Rob Halford, tassles, beard & bandanna, studded leather gay boy brigade on an old man's tractor... as opposed to the faggoty, Tom Cruise, iPhone-using, one-piece leathers all colour-matched just like their nail varnish and clutch purse, Power Ranger posse on Small Penis speed-gun magnets, of course!!

Attitude - You are not a Hells Angel. You are not American. You are not even anything *that* special. The fact that your bike goes slow enough for people to actually see how cool you are is just an advantageous design feature. make the most of it, by all means, but do NOT fill the stereotype most accurately described above by Pete... except shares in Autosol. You need that...!!

But yeah, break the mould, wave at everyone, share the road, live the dream, ride all over the place, fuck get out and be a biker, man - This is what it's ultimately all about. Life is great, you have a wicked bike, what more could you want!!!

Sorry, what was the question again?

Ah yes, the bike...

I hope you know all about Countersteering?

Every bike does this, but because your feet are forward and not under you on a Cruiser, you will REALLY notice it. All your steering comes from the arms. This is curse at some moments and a blessing at others, particularly if you counter-steer consciously.

Corners - These are NOT your enemy, but you will have to take them slower and wider. Too fast or too wide and you will deck out (scrape) the pegs (or floorboards if you have them). 'Cat riders are particularly reknowned for switching bikes and decking out. ;)

When you turn at speeds above maybe 15mph, don't just lean in, but picture everything below you sliding outward as well - Imagine actually planting your arse into the outside of the turn... like you're sitting into it. Hard to explain, but this will become more apparent when you're blatting down the twisties and take sharp or sweeping bends. Once you learn the angles, you can make surprisingly tight turns!

Horn - Yours will sound as faggotty and pathetic as it really is. Swap it out for one of those twin snail thingies or whatever you find sounds best for you.

Filtering - Your bike will be about 3-foot wide. Once you learn this and the 'twist' points where your lack of fairing is an advantage, you can handle most traffic. Motorways are piss-easy. But it will take time to get the feel for the gaps and you do NOT want to fuck it up on a bike like this. Take your time, take it easy and get there in good time.

Exhaust - Loud pipes do not save lives. Not really. You will still have to ride with all the defensiveness that any other bike requires. People will assume you're slow and try to beat you when pulling out, moving off, etc.

However, the visual size, associated 1%er image and menacing rumble of a V-Twin approaching is still imposing enough that some drivers will notice and move out your way, especially when filtering. You can usually clutch in and give it a massive, sudden whack on the throttle. Your bike will bark like a pissed off Balrog!! :D

Power/torque - You have a lot, but it's really low down. You can close the throttle almost completely and be doing 5mph in 2nd gear without having to slip the clutch. Everything will be engaged and with just a touch of right hand, you'll amble along reeeeeeeeeal easy. Sporties are usually blipping the fuck out of their bikes at this point and it's really annoying.

However, wrench open the throttle and you'll take off. Open it too fast and your acceleration will be bogged, so rapid but not overkill. Full throttle will probably be 2-4 seconds, at a rough guess.

Also, the grips are bigger, so you can give it some without overcranking it. Just remember your muscle is in pushing off from slow, so take it especially easy during low-speed manoeuvres.

Weight - You'll be solidly planted in corners!!

Braking is for shit compared to other bikes, because your forward-raked forks push more of the braking power along the road rather than down into the tyre. If you have twin discs on the front, good for you. Either way, learn to apply *A LITTLE* back brake to help alter the balance, for the rare occasions you might need it.

Backing the bike up is easier than a tall Sportie as your body is better placed for it. Pushing is easier while sat on the thing, too.

Speed - Forget it. You might be quick off the mark, but this ain't a racing bike. You can abuse it some and end up throwing it round quite well, but believe me when I say it's better suited to taking it easy and just enjoying the ride!!

Degredation - You have lots of chrome. You also have lots of nooks and crannies that will trap road crap, salt, water and what-have-you. Believe me again, when I say keep that bastard clean, or it will rot out from under you in places you'd never even think to check.

Fuel - Pretty economical, usually. Big tank, V-Twin rumbler, easy(ish) rider... Ride happy and you'll do well. I get 48mpg from my Drag even if I rag the fuck out of it, so being a bit more sensible usually sees that figure start with a 5. No reason you couldn't feasibly achieve this too.

Distance - Again, no rush. Yes, you can top the Ton and a few other fun tricks, but this is an armchair. relax, enjoy the miles and you'll be riding long after the sore-arsed Sporties have limped and hobbled into the nearest Premier Inn.

If you start out at 3am, you can go from Reading to Scotland in time for breakfast, catch some scenery and still be home in time for tea and crumpets!!

Weather - You'll discover this, big time! Look at how you sit on the bike - You're a fucking kite. Every little forward breeze and gust will be magnified. Side winds, however, seem less of an issue on the unfaired bike. You will also get wet, so keep waterproofs to hand when expecting bad things. A screen may be useful to you. I never bothered (this ain't CHiPS), but some like them and they come in various heights.

Accessories - LOADS of room for 'stuff'. Heated grips, SatNav, Radio, CB, radar detector... you name it, you can probably clip or clamp it on somewhere!!

Accents - If you really do like all that chrome trim and stuff, you're spoilt for choice. A thousand little men with $ signs (and occasionally £ or € ones) will spill out of the woodwork to sell you tiny chromed bolt covers, nick-nacks and doo-dads that they say will *completely* change your bike's appearance... your call.

Also, any tassles, conchos or studded leather will further the piss-taking!!

Maintenance - Half your spannering will be fucking easy, as you've no fairing to remove. The other half will be pigging awkward, as you still have to take off tank, seats, mudguards, airbox, etc etc.

For goodness sake, get a decent bike lift, to make half your stuff easier!!

Lastly... Luggage - BIG-ASS SADDLEBAGS!! With these, plus tool roll type thing, backrest bag (if you have a pillion) or a large touring bag, tank bag, some bungies or rope and you can carry almost anything. Seriously, kitchen sink time.

Check this out - This bag has over 8 stone of kit inside, plus a 1.5 stone WW2 tent on the front, a light steel WW2 helmet on top and about 3 stone of stuff in each (small) saddlebag. On the way down I had a 42lb mortar behind the helmet as well. Bike was slightly slow, but very comfy and lacked that vacuum space that topbox users get!

I also think this is the only photo of my bike I've ever put up here...

SDC10619.jpg

If I think of anything else, I'll add it here!

Happy riding!!!

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Brilliant essay you've written there Ttaskmaster! Lots of useful stuff in that. Thanks for taking the time.

Gonna be pretty nervous the first time I jump on to ride it home, I reckon. But it's all part of the adventure!

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Just take it easy and ride it like you stole it - Safely, carefully and at speeds that won't attract Police attention! ;)

That's my tagline, by the way. Trademarked, copyrighted and all that gubbins!!

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My XVS 1300 was brilliant, fantastic bike and wish I never traded it. It'll hit 70 in 2nd, is a bit slow in the bends (I hear changing away from stock tyres improves this) and will do between 130-150 miles on a tank.

One downside is it takes a lot of polishing to keep it looking good compared to tourer type bikes, but is worth the effort!

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Cheers Clarke! Can't wait. Just the noise and the looks of it. I don't need it to be fast - though I'm sure the torque'll pull my arms out their sockets, haha.

The Thundercat, though massively fast, doesn't provide you with any 'feeling' of acceleration.

I think it's because of how you're hunched over the tank, you don't feel the G-forces so much.

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TBH, you possibly won't notice the torque so much, unless you whack the throttle open from a rather low speed. Cruisers use torque to shift weight, rather than power to get moving fast. Under normal revs, you'll find it pulling smooth. Fully loaded with pillion and luggage, you'll not notice much difference.

The arm-pulling will happen once you break the speed-limit on a motorway. Good speed warning as well, that - If it starts to ache, you're going too fast*!

*That is, fast enough for plod to pull you!

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