If you choke a smurf what colour would he turn?

Why do kamikaze pilots ware helmets?

Why do they sterilize lethal injection needles?

Why is a near miss not a near collision?

>If you choke a smurf what colour would he turn?

Reddish purple.

>Why do kamikaze pilots ware helmets?

In case they change their minds at the last moment... or fuck it up and want to try again.

>Why do they sterilize lethal injection needles?

There's an official reason for this (Google it yerself), but I like to think it's the executioner having the one laugh his career permits!

>Why is a near miss not a near collision?

It depends how far a miss it was. You generally have missed, but near the target (near-miss) and you have missed by a mile (Fookin' WAAAAAAY off, lad!).

and you have missed by a mile (Fookin' WAAAAAAY off, lad!).

That made me laugh.

Why does Captain Birdseye go to sea with all them small boys?

Why do ambulances with their blues and two's on and large yellow/green battenburgs have to have the word ambulance spelt backwards on the bonnet so when they are right behind you, you can see the word ambulance in the rear view mirror?

If you force your self onto a prostitute is it classed as rape or shoplifting?

>Why does Captain Birdseye go to sea with all them small boys?

Child labour is cheaper than employing Polish fish-handlers.

>Why do ambulances with their blues and two's on... [snip]... see the word ambulance in the rear view mirror?

To remind people it's not an 'Amber Lights'.

>If you force your self onto a prostitute is it classed as rape or shoplifting?

Both, especially if she has a good lawyer.