Posted February 10, 200520 yr Hi folks I hope you find some of these tips handy - hence the title 'Handy Tips. Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand next to the object you wish to view. Always poo at work. Not only do you save money on toilet paper, you'll get paid for doing it! WEIGHT WATCHERS. Avoid that devilish temptation to nibble at a chocolate bar in the cupboard or fridge by not buying the f**k**g thing in the first place you fat b*st**d! Recreate the fun of a visit to the swimming pool in your own home by filling the bath with cold water, adding two bottles of bleach, then urinating into it before jumping in. Don't buy expensive ribbed condoms, just buy an ordinary one and slip a handful of frozen peas inside it before you slip it on. Anorexics. When your knees get fatter than your legs, start eating cake. An empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator! Olympic athletes. Disguise the fact that you're using steroids by running slower! High blood pressure sufferers. Simply cut yourself and bleed for a while, thus reducing the pressure. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep.
February 10, 200520 yr Recreate the fun of a visit to the swimming pool in your own home by filling the bath with cold water, adding two bottles of bleach, then urinating into it before jumping in. haha i'll give that one a miss...
February 10, 200520 yr Moderator That alarm clock trick sounds like a sure-fire way to get up in a hurry!
February 11, 200520 yr lol! they were all bloody great hehe! that was more than worthy of my 1minutes worth of reading time
February 12, 200520 yr Admin Always poo at work. Not only do you save money on toilet paper, you'll get paid for doing it! I need to get a job then!
March 6, 200519 yr here's my mate's suggestion as an alternative to going to the isle of man stick that stupid bike noises CD on your player, grab a tray off piss poor beer, sit in a full bath with all your clothes on, and the shower head running, and post all your money down the overflow pipe whilst drinking the beer if you've ever been you'll understand the similarities thankfully i was in a B&B and my bike was garaged while he suffered!!
March 10, 200519 yr Moderator here's my mate's suggestion as an alternative to going to the isle of man stick that stupid bike noises CD on your player, grab a tray off piss poor beer, sit in a full bath with all your clothes on, and the shower head running, and post all your money down the overflow pipe whilst drinking the beer if you've ever been you'll understand the similarities Never Been, but have always wanted to go.......But now I'm NOT so sure? Guess I'll just have to be satisfied with MotoGP @ Laguna.
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