Moderator YamaHead Posted December 24, 2004 Moderator Share Posted December 24, 2004 Deer Santa: I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer. Yer frend, Billy Dear Billy, Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a friggin' book so you can learn to read & write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell! Santa Dear Santa, I've been a good girl all year, and the only thing I want is peace & joy in the world for everybody! Love, Sarah Dear Sarah, Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they? Santa Dear Santa, I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my Mommy & Daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do. Love, Teddy Dear Teddy, Look, your Dad's banging the babysitter like a screendoor in a Hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your Frigid, Fat Mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me get you some nice Legos instead. Maybe you can build yourself a family with those? Santa Dear Santa, I left milk & cookies for you under the tree, & I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door. Love, Susan Dear Susan, Milk gives me the shits & carrots make the reindeer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Two Words......Jack Daniels. Santa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
liquidcooled Posted December 24, 2004 Share Posted December 24, 2004 Dear Susan, Milk gives me the shits & carrots make the reindeer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Two Words......Jack Daniels. Santa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Beezkneez Posted December 24, 2004 Moderator Share Posted December 24, 2004 Dear Santa, I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my Mommy & Daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do. Love, Teddy Dear Teddy, Look, your Dad's banging the babysitter like a screendoor in a Hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your Frigid, Fat Mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me get you some nice Legos instead. Maybe you can build yourself a family with those? Santa quality Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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