Am I turning into a grumpy old bast...rd

[Gas up - Let's Go!]

I know it narks Tskmaster......

Newbies, on thier first post, is it realy too much to say "hello my name is xxxxx, I ride a xxx, I have 11 toes and a 3inch willy" or something similar?

There have been a plethora of post in the last few days, first post from these people are problems.

or am I just a grumpy old bast....rd

[Airhead]

no it narks me too, sometimes i say so in not so many words. the worst ones IMO are the first timers who begin with 'So'

[Vez]

Same here, think its just rude expecting help without so much as a "how do you do, im xxx" 

Tbh i don't think i made an introduction post , think the first post i made was helping someone to de-restrict there DTRE iirc.  

Can't we ask Alex to place some kind of advisory on the registration email, requesting new people to make an introduction of some sort? Just a thought.

Vez.

[Hughsie]

Bear in mind, guys. Some people register for various forums to try and get as much information as they can.

It's not like a group ride out who turn up to ask someone to fix their bike and then feck off again.

I'm all for introductions. It's nice to know their name at least. But a lot of people just need information to fix their bikes as soon as time permits

[Ttaskmaster]

This is *EXACTLY* like a group ride.

If you go up to a bunch of bikers and just simply say, "I've got this bike and it's not working. Thoughts?", the response will be a unanimous Feck Off.

If you rudely demand info, without so much as a pleasantry, then rudeness and a brush-off is all you'll get back. This is a community, not a free reference library. The idea is to contribute wherever you can, not to just demand information as if we're a vending machine and then feck off without so much as a thank-you.

A lot of our answers take hours of typing and checking against manuals, sourcing of pictures and so on. If it's just gonna go unappreciated then none of us will bother. This place will be just a forum of wannabe kiddies boasting about getting their knees down, pulling wheelies and shagging their birds.

If you introduce yourself, make friends and take the time to make some sort of attempt to join in the forum community, then the people here will freely share their wealth of knowledge.

Half the issues can be resolved by using the Search function anyway (I have even referred back to previous posts of my own, mainly because it's quicker than typing the whole thing out again) and these threads do display both on search engines and for non-registered users.

If all you want is info, there are people who get paid to fulfil your rude demands. They're called professional mechanics.

What I want is mandatory profile fields, teling me who someone is, where they're from, what bike they ride and perhaps a few other details. This actually helps anyway because I may know of an Aerox specialist in Tidfield, or an R1 parts supplier in Chilton, or wherever the Newbie happens to live. If they're that local to me, I'd even be prepared to go visit them and show them what I'm talking about. I know others here have done that.

I also want a posting limit and restricted membership, say 5 posts, before allowing them access to the full forum. Other forums do this, for these very reasons. It stops timewasters and it stops us miserable buggers from ranting!!

Whaddya say?

[barkwindjammer]

WHATS ALL THIS SHOUTING?, WE'LL HAVE NO TROUBLE HERE

[Gas up - Let's Go!]

Whaddya say?

We'll I kinda like

shagging their birds.

Can we just turn up and do this, or should we introduce ourselves first ?

[barkwindjammer]

I agree with most of the above, OG has a 'tumbleweed' icon which if I had I'd post right after a newbie came on with the first post "so, my bike wont work its a blah blah blah", that should give them the message

[Cynic]

For now i think a link to this thread might spark the fire of understanding....

Not everybody is a spotty oik expecting the world on a plate. There may be people who have been lurking in the sidelines for a while and havent realised we didn't even know they were there.

'The quiet bloke at the bar week on week' if i may expand Ttask's analogy slightly.

[johnsnownw]

I am unfamiliar with the term "nark." But I feel it too

[Erman]

I gotta say, I was one of "those" who signed up to get as much information about my then newly bought bike.

During the mending process, I make how-tos to suit exactly my bike, so that others who own the same bike can be informed.

+ the fact that I'm still working on getting the driver's licence, I really don't consider myself as one to disappear once the problem is solved.

In order to contribute to a community, one must first have something to contribute. I agree that a lot of first posts with small problems that can be fixed on th fly can be tedious, but a lot of kids nowadays are like that...

[Clinton bennett]

I agree with the intorduction part, is just nice to know a little about someone, what I will say though this forum is not really used that much, I used to have an Aprilia Falco, the theri forum is really used well, full of helpfull people chatting and exchanging information all of the time. In additon its a great source of information on how to tweek and fix things. There is nothing worse than posting a question (after an introduction) and getting no replies, even if the reply is just sorry cant help you.

Just food for thought not a rant

Cheers

[Ttaskmaster]

In order to contribute to a community, one must first have something to contribute.

You have only six posts and yet have just contributed.

It's this sort of thing that we're talking about. If you want to tap us for free info, we'd like some kind of return. Simply joining in is enough - Express an opinion, start a debate, post some jokes, link to a news article... there are many ways.

[KirriePete]

Have to admit my first post (Link here for the curious) was seeking advice, but it had a whole lot more background detail and info (plus pics) than the recent influx of "My bike's broken, tell me how to fix it" posts. So here's a template for all newbies with a problem:

Hi, I'm Luke Skywalker from Tatooine. I've just started training as a Jedi and need a bit of info on light-sabres, coz my MkII green'un is a bit limp, and I was told this is the place to come. I hope you don't mind me picking your brains, but if it all works out I will be a full Jedi Master in short order and will be more than willing to help train novices in future.

See? Polite, bit of intro, inferred promise to hang around and add to the forum, plus you get to air your problem(s). Seemples!

[Vez]

Had another thought, why not make a section just for the one post wonders and those after a quick fix. Then those of us who want to help can, and those of us who don't can ignore them even easier?

[Cynic]

Had another thought, why not make a section just for the one post wonders and those after a quick fix. Then those of us who want to help can, and those of us who don't can ignore them even easier?

Can't see many people posting in the 'i'm a selfish sod who is on the take' section.

I put a link to this topic in a reply to a new member and he just hadnt twigged to the forum 'etique'. Whole paragraph on his next post. Nice bloke as far as i can see.

I'm going to make it part of my sig i think.

[Vez]

Can't see many people posting in the 'i'm a selfish sod who is on the take' section.

I put a link to this topic in a reply to a new member and he just hadnt twigged to the forum 'etique'. Whole paragraph on his next post. Nice bloke as far as i can see.

I'm going to make it part of my sig i think.

Well you don't just right out call it a "one post wonder section", you name it something like "newbies" or " General bike problems".

The link in the sig is a good idea. i think i'm going to put a link to the 2-stroke gathering in mine

[Ttaskmaster]

Hi, I'm Luke Skywalker from Tatooine. I've just started training as a Jedi and need a bit of info on light-sabres, coz my MkII green'un is a bit limp, and I was told this is the place to come.

This is indeed the place.

Lightsabres are usually made primarily from a Graflex handle. There are several licenced replicas, but Lucasfilm command a seriously high licencing fee and mercilessly pursue any unlicenced producers, even one-off fan builds, flooding them with C&D orders.

If your blade is a bit limp, I suggest checking the earthing on your blade modulation circuit:

For more information, check out: The Lightsabre.com

It has also come to my attention that some people do not know what the colors of a Jedi's lightsaber mean, or the fact that they mean anything. So here is a basic guide:

Blue = Jedi Guardian = "I WILL PWN YOU WITH MY BLUE LIGHTSABER!!!!".

Red = Dark side = HATE!!

Yellow = Jedi Sentinel = "Can't we all be friends?".

Green = Jedi Counselor = "I am so much smarter than all you people, but I would never say that cuz I am SO at peace with myself".

Orange = Jedi Fodder = "I am only in this movie to die in the first major fight / get PWNed by generic clone troopers".

Purple = This is a unique case. It happened thusly:

Prop Man: So Mr. Jackson-

SEJ: YOU WILL ADDRESS ME BY MY FULL NAME, FOR I AM THE LORD OF BADASSERY!!

Prop Man: Sorry Mr- I mean Samuel L. Jackson. Anyways, what color lightsaber would you like?

SEJ: Purple

Prop Man: But Samuel L. Jackson, that's not one of the colors!!

SEJ: ...

Prop Man: Purple it is.

[barkwindjammer]

This is indeed the place.

Lightsabres are usually made primarily from a Graflex handle. There are several licenced replicas, but Lucasfilm command a seriously high licencing fee and mercilessly pursue any unlicenced producers, even one-off fan builds, flooding them with C&D orders.

If your blade is a bit limp, I suggest checking the earthing on your blade modulation circuit:

For more information, check out: The Lightsabre.com

It has also come to my attention that some people do not know what the colors of a Jedi's lightsaber mean, or the fact that they mean anything. So here is a basic guide:

Blue = Jedi Guardian = "I WILL PWN YOU WITH MY BLUE LIGHTSABER!!!!".

Red = Dark side = HATE!!

Yellow = Jedi Sentinel = "Can't we all be friends?".

Green = Jedi Counselor = "I am so much smarter than all you people, but I would never say that cuz I am SO at peace with myself".

Orange = Jedi Fodder = "I am only in this movie to die in the first major fight / get PWNed by generic clone troopers".

Purple = This is a unique case. It happened thusly:

Prop Man: So Mr. Jackson-

SEJ: YOU WILL ADDRESS ME BY MY FULL NAME, FOR I AM THE LORD OF BADASSERY!!

Prop Man: Sorry Mr- I mean Samuel L. Jackson. Anyways, what color lightsaber would you like?

SEJ: Purple

Prop Man: But Samuel L. Jackson, that's not one of the colors!!

SEJ: ...

Prop Man: Purple it is.

I didn't know a 'light-sabre' had a "POWER CONTROL KNOB",

[Airhead]

I didn't know a 'light-sabre' had a "POWER CONTROL KNOB",

Yes it does have a power control and dont be so bloody cheeky!