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Lucky Jim


mike1949
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Jim worked on a building site as a brickie, one day he was late for work. When he arrived the site foreman was waiting at his Portacabin door with his watch. (a bit like Blakie from on the buses)

"JIM!!" "Get over here NOW!"

When Jim got there with a big grin on his face, the foreman said "Why are you late?

"Don't worry about me being late boss, just call me Lucky Jim"

Foreman - "What on earth are you on about?"

Lucky Jim - "Well, when I saw my bus going round the corner to my bus stop, I legged it but when I got there the bus crashed head on into a petrol tanker and exploded into a fireball. If I'd been on it I would have been killed outright"

Foreman - "Golly Gosh Jim, sorry I mean Lucky Jim, right get to work and make up your time and we'll forget about it."

After his dinner break Lucky Jim was late back. Upon which the foreman called him over. "Lucky Jim, why are you late back from your dinner break, you know we have got a very tight schedule to work from and I don't want to incur any penalties because it will affect everybody's bonus's"

Lucky Jim - "Don't worry about that boss,just call me Lucky, Lucky Jim. If I'd have come back on time I would have been stood right were that cement hopper crashed when It's chain broke, it would have flattened me to about the thickness of an old penny"

Foreman - "Blimey, Lucky, Lucky Jim. I think you'd better go home in case anything else happens, I'll see you nice and early in the morning then"

Next morning when Lucky, Lucky Jim was late, his foreman called him over again and said. "Why are you late again"

Lucky Jim - "Don't worry about that boss, just call me Lucky, Lucky, Lucky Jim."

Foreman - "What on earth are you on about?"

Lucky Jim - "Well, when I went home and told the wife what had happened yesterday we decided to go out on the town and celebrate. We had a few drinks and decided to come back and celebrate in the bedroom"

"Anyway, when we were celebrating, we had a thunderstorm and a bolt of lightning struck my chimney pot and it went crashing through the roof, straight through the bedroom ceiling and landed on my backside"

Foreman - "What's so lucky about that?"

Lucky Jim - Well, if it had done it two minutes earlier, it would have hit me right on the back of my neck!"

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