Paddy goes for a Pizza, he's sat down in the restaurant and the waiter turns up with the potatoe and guinnes pizza.

'Woulda youa lika da pizza cut ina da 6 pieces or da 8 pieces.'

'Well now, you'd better be cutting it into 6, oi dont tink oi can manage 8.'

oi loiks dat

'Well now, you'd better be cutting it into 6, oi dont tink oi can manage 8.'

The other version is.

"Well now, you'd better be cutting it into 8, because I'm fecking starving!)

A man walks past a restaurant with a sign in the window saying

"We will cook you any meal you want or we will give you £20.00"

He goes in and asks for an elephant's ear sandwich.

Two minutes later the waiter comes back and says

"Sorry sir we are right out of bread"