WOMEN’S ENGLISH

Yes = No

No = Yes

Maybe = No

I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry

We need = I want

It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious

Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later (see HERE )

We need to talk = I need to complain

Sure, go ahead = I don’t want you to do that

I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset

You’re so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot

Be romantic and turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs

This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house

I want new curtains = I want new curtains, carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper

I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep

Do you love me? = I want something expensive

How much do you love me? = I did something terrible today

I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me

MEN’S ENGLISH

I’m hungry = I’m hungry

I’m sleepy = I’m sleepy

I’m tired = I’m tired

Do you want to go to a movie? = I’d like to have sex with you

Can I take you out to dinner? = I’d like to have sex with you

Can I call you sometime? = I’d like to have sex with you

May I have this dance? = I’d like to have sex with you

Nice dress! = Nice tits!

You look tense = I want to fondle you

What’s wrong? = What self-inflicted psychological trauma is it this time?

What’s wrong? = I’m guessing sex is out of the question

I’m bored = Would you like to fuck?

I love you = I’d like to fuck right now

I love you, too = I really want to fuck

Let’s talk = I’d like to show you my emotional depth as a prelude to sex

Will you marry me? = I really enjoy having sex with you

hahaa,

nice one!!