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The wife got me a Philips 42 " for Christmas.

What the fuck do I need a screwdriver that big for?

You must have one major screw loose then :P

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My wife asked me what was my favourite Telly Tubby

I told her its the 42" Philips and not to be so cheeky!!

A man walks into a petrol station and says

"Can I please have a kitkat chunky?".

The lady behind the till gets him a kitkat chunky and brings it back to him.

"No" says the man. "I wanted a normal kitkat you fat bitch"

What the fuck do I need a screwdriver that big for?

Leverage.

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