Cutting it down to size.....

[SRJ999]

A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two large plastic rubbish bags with her, one in each hand. Unfortunately, there's a rip in one of the bags and every once in a while a £20 note falls out on to the pavement.

Noticing this, a policeman stops her and says, "Madam, there are £20 notes falling out of your bag."

"Really? Oh, dear!" says the old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can collect them. Thanks for the warning."

"Not so fast," says the cop. 'How did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"

"Oh, no", says the little old lady. "My back garden is right next to the the football stadium car park. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans pee through the bushes onto my flower beds. I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper and, each time someone sticks his thingy through the bushes, I say, '£20, or off it comes'"

"That seems fair." laughs the cop. "OK, good luck. By the way; what's in the other bag?"

"Not everybody pays."

[Airhead]

[rockerted]

ouch!!