Aquila

Today was Lisping Jedi Day... May The 4th Be With You!

Bloody lycra-clad, sperm-hatted shove bikes should pay towards their road use - they cause enough problems in moving traffic with their total abuse of the Highway Code; make them cough up!

Signed! Another scamola from the haggis-noshers that rule England. Slam up petrol prices so we have to use bikes instead of cars, then tax-up bikes, They must think that we zip up at the fucking back. Damn their eyes...

I'll be there early on (about 10-ish) for about an hour. I'll be with my daughter (who is rapidly becoming a 'Biker Bitch') and we'll be in my blue Rover 220 Tomcat which has my forum name next to the number plate. Look forward to meeting anyone from the site...

Great movie! Funny as...

Copied and pasted through to PistonHeads and SafeSpeed general chat areas. HTH...

Hi all, Took No.1 Daughter to Sarfend to see the bikes and got some phone footage - hope it works as there wuz some shit-hot bikes around. http://s156.photobucket.com/albums/t7/Trau...=shakedown1.flv http://s156.photobucket.com/albums/t7/Trau...=shakedown2.flv http://s156.photobucket.com/albums/t7/Trau...=shakedown3.flv

If the bike 'suddenly stopped sparking', my money is on the HT lead/plug cap. These are quite fragile and use moulded graphite cores as conductors. If they crack, there may not be enough current present to 'jump the gap'. Try getting a new lead and cap. You can check if 'arcing' is occurring by getting an old transistor radio and tuning it to a blank area (no station) at the top end of the Long Wave (LW) band. Kick the engine over and, if you hear a rhythmic 'tic-tic-tic', you have a cracked graphite conductor. Promise me that you will not test an HT circuit with your tongue, as stated in the OP header. It is perfectly possible for you to join your Grandad if you do...

Count me in - haven't been there for bloody years! May well come up on four wheels and bring my kids with me - introduce them to a Cafe culture legend, as long as Pirate Livingstone hasn't extended the Car Envy Charge Zone out that far by then...

You enjoy your bike however you want to mate - this is not about when you ride, but how you ride. My DragStar is my main transport but I have a car that is my 'toy'. A Rover 220 Tomcat with Piper asymmetric cams, Pipercross induction kit and a Powerflow 4" exhaust - 180bhp and 195ft.lb torque. It is a weekend car used for track-days and 'meets' with PistonHeads and the Rover Owners Club. It is driven hard on the track, but with due respect for others on the road. The problem with the weekend bikers is lack of this respect for others, themselves and their machines. A mate of mine has a lovely term for people on track-days that stuff their motors into the tyre-walls; he says that they 'ran out of talent'. Unfortunately this is happening all too often on the public roads among the 'weekend' mob and their statistics are leading some sections of the government to call for a ban on motorcycles, which would be intolerable.

A concentric air filter (like a car 'induction kit') and a cat-less expansion chamber exhaust will make the engine breathe better and improve your acceleration (Kendall and Pitt in Barrack Street may be able to help you with these), but 65mph on an AeroX is pretty close to maximum rpm. I have heard of a couple that claimed to be able to do 90mph but were forever replacing piston rings and bending crankshafts/con rods. Best bet is to wait until you can get a 125 and derestrict it - one of my son's mates had an old Kwacker AR125 that I have paced down the A12 in my car at 103mph! Where in Colchester are you? I'm in Stanway. Look for a maroon/ivory DragStar cruiser and a black/silver Nexx open face lid - giz a wave and I'll wave back! Good luck with your tuning project... (Word to the wise: There's a new donut-muncher working from Stanway Garages, recently transferred in from Brentwood. He's a miserable sod and hates all bikers. He pulled me this arvo for taking a corner 'too wide and too fast', which was horse-shit - any slower or kerbward and I'd have fallen off on someone's front fucking lawn! He then proceded to talk to me like I was some sort of noob moron about the dangers of biking. When he looked at my licence and realised that I am fifty fucking one years old, his only comment was 'you're old enough to know better!' Dopey cunt couldn't even be arsed to get out of his fucking Richmond Panzer Range Rover while he lectured me. He assumed that, just because I ride a 125, I'm a kid when, in fact, I was riding bikes when he was still shitting in nappies. Watch out for him - he looks like a Bulldog licking piss off a thistle and his mate seems to be a Disney 'animatronic' robot... They are both )

Now, now! Don't be naughty! He's having a go at getting the most out of his bike and should be encouraged - he's pretty rare among young 'uns today who largely seem too lazy or too thick to try a bit of tweaking. It could turn out that, some time in the future, you get blown into the weeds by a kid on an old TZR250...

Aquila:- Real name - Josh 51 year-old physicist working in education; specialising in cosmology and trying to talk to blokes what do scary shit with waaaaaay sub-atomic particles and trying to get a toe in the door of the Large Hadron Collider at CERN. Private research centres around the load of bollocks that is man-made climate change - utter shite and don't let anyone tell you different! Motoring history from age 17:- Honda ST50 Honda CB65S Kawasaki KS125 (later re-barrelled and cranked to 175) Royal Enfield 250 Continental with Egli frame, half-fairing, clip-ons, rear-sets and forks by Marzocchi - shit-hot! Kawasaki S1A - 3-pot 250 with frame by Play-Doh - shit-scary! Kawasaki KH250 - bloody good mud-plugger. {passes car test at 21) Mini Cooper 1082S Ford Escort MkI GT - fitted with 1500GT Cortina lump and 2000GT Corsair gearbox. Ford Cortina 1600GT MkII Ford Escort Mexico 1600 MkI Ford Cortina MkIII - fitted with 1800 Taunus 17M engine and Quaife 5-speed transaxle Triumph Spitfire MkIII fitted with GT6 2-litre lump and OD gearbox VW Polo MkI fitted with 1.4 Scirocco G-Lader engine and gearbox - 1st rally car Ford Escort MkII 1600 Ghia - the car that my son came home from the maternity ward in Lancia Delta 1600 HF iE - second rally car and the car that my daughter came home from the maternity ward in Ford Fiesta MkI XR2 - poor bloody thing ended up with more mods than Frankenstein's monster... Audi GT - 2309cc five-pot. Awesome! Audi 80 quattro - 2226cc five-pot with 4WD; third rally car and the best car I ever owned. Sublime donuts and 'crazy 8's' Alfa Romeo 75 2.0 T-Spark - ten years old and still capable of 140mph Alfa Romeo 145 Blue Cloverleaf - fucking shitbag money-pit; prayed it would catch fire but it never fucking did !979 MGBGT - Dear old lady with completely random electrics; died of tin-worm and sorely missed Rover 220 Tomcat Coupe - being prepared as a weekend toy; 165bhp at wheels prior to supercharging and NOs- phwoar! Yamaha XVS125 - My daily ride and I love her to bits (she's called 'Lil' after Lily Savage, another great Drag Star!) Well you did bloody ask!

----- Original Message ----- From: <[email protected]> To: "xxx" <[email protected]>; "xxxx" <[email protected]>; "xxx" <[email protected]> Sent: Sunday, February 24, 2008 12:53 PM Subject: Chicken story > Trevor, the farmer, was in the fertilised egg business. He had > several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets' and eight or > ten roosters,whose job was to fertilise the eggs. The farmer kept > records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot > and was replaced > > That took an awful lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells > and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone > so Trevor could tell, from a distance, which rooster was performing. > Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report > simply by listening to the bells. > > The farmer's favourite rooster was old Gordon, and a very fine > specimen he was too. But on this particular morning Trevor noticed > old Gordon's bell hadn't rung at all! Trevor went to investigate. > The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The > pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. But to > farmer Trevor's amazement, Gordon had his bell in his beak, so it > couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to > the next one. > > Trevor was so proud of Gordon, he entered him in the West Berks > County Fair and Gordon became an overnight sensation among the judges. > > The result? The judges not only awarded Gordon the No Bell Piece > Prize but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well. Clearly > Gordon was a politician in the making: Who else but a politician > could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on > our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and > screwing them when they weren't paying attention. > > Do you know a Pullitician called Gordon?

I would disagree that bad car drivers are worse than bad motorcyclists as they usually don't have machines that have power-to-weight ratios in excess of 600bhp/tonne. I have just returned to biking after nearly a quarter of a century. My XVS125 gives 13bhp/185kg or around 70bhp/tonne - my Rover 220 Tomcat (now being prepared as a track-day/weekend car) gives 225bhp/1650kg or 136bhp/tonne. Riders of R1's, Hyabusas etc. are running in the realms of Astons/Lambos/Ferraris that twats don't tend to drive. If you assume that anyone in a car is a psychopathic knob-head, you'll do OK on a bike. On the other hand, people on bikes with colour-coded one-piece leathers tend to be similarly afflicted, as in the case of the bollock-brain on a Ninja who popped a wheelie up the A12 off-slip at Stanway and ended up on the boot-lid of my car as he over-cooked the front brake trying to do an 'endo' at the top of the slip-road. The git just picked himself up, got back on his bike and fucked off without so much as a by-your-leave/kiss my arse etc. I am having the damage to my car assessed tomorrow - probably around £500. I hope he twisted his frame, 'cos I'll twist his bollocks if I ever see him again...